3

votes

What Percentage of Compliance Is Needed Before I Can Be Called a Grokkling?

Answered on August 19, 2014
Created January 17, 2012 at 5:02 PM

I do know from reading all around here for several months that there are those of you guys that are nearly at total compliance and there are those that flirt with it and there are those of us (me) that can't seem to get there at all.

I am daily amazed at the information I can get here (it's nearly become my goto for health info before I go anywhere else) and how helpful everyone is. But how hard is it to get into this club without feeling like a #faileo to paleo?

Would anyone want to break down the compliance steps for me?

My goals are to lose weight, get fit, and be healthier. Pretty much in that order.

  1. losing grains and sugar
  2. ?

Thanks!

1372f4b0e01dad65d75b0eb7ac3ba6f8

(35)

on February 04, 2012
at 04:34 AM

What about Miso soup with green onions?

A968087cc1dd66d480749c02e4619ef4

(20436)

on January 18, 2012
at 02:23 PM

You could probably add avoid toxic things like transfat, MSG and yellow #5, but losing packaged food should take care of those for the most part. Then you could start looking at food quality. Ya know, grass fed versus grain fed beef and stuff like that. But again, that's tweaking. 80% or more of the benefit is from the first two things in the above list. Unless you happen to be extremely sensitive to a particular food and it's causing a health issue...

6cdc6b1e75690cfcc4804a6c9eaa910a

(2171)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:47 PM

...and yes, I gave you the upvote to get you there...cheers!

B4e1fa6a8cf43d2b69d97a99dfca262c

(10255)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:43 PM

we're allowed clothes?!?!?!

C4f1a0c70c4e0dea507c2e346c036bbd

on January 17, 2012
at 05:34 PM

and your spelling too!

A968087cc1dd66d480749c02e4619ef4

(20436)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:16 PM

stolded my answer!

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10 Answers

9
246ebf68e35743f62e5e187891b9cba0

(21430)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:50 PM

At level 3, you have to defeat the main boss Big Ag, and his underling CAFO; for which you get the powerup "Kerrygold". Then you will attain the level of Grokling.

At level 6, you have to beat Epic Monsanto... I suggest you spend some time leveling up fighting PETAfiles and Common Wiz Doms to get the Sword of Harris. Then you will be a Grokmaster.

This would be on "Normal" Difficulty. If you pick hard, you'll have to play while naked in the Savannah armed only with a sharp stick and Vibrams.

On a serious note, it takes some time to really get used to eating right and getting an appropriate amount of exercise. The important part is to not get discouraged, find out what works for you, and when you think of faltering... remember the illnesses that made you seek out a better way.

6
C4f1a0c70c4e0dea507c2e346c036bbd

on September 07, 2013
at 12:44 AM

You need to grow a beard and wear a leotard.

B4e1fa6a8cf43d2b69d97a99dfca262c

(10255)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:43 PM

we're allowed clothes?!?!?!

A968087cc1dd66d480749c02e4619ef4

(20436)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:16 PM

stolded my answer!

C4f1a0c70c4e0dea507c2e346c036bbd

on January 17, 2012
at 05:34 PM

and your spelling too!

4
Medium avatar

(2923)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:49 PM

You too can become a grokling in one quick easy step! It's fast, it's easy, it's risk free*! Just send $19.95 (check and money order only, do not send cash) and a postage-paid envelope to the following address and we'll mail you your membership card! But wait! Act now and we'll include a printout of Whole9's "Paleo Poor", a printout of Robb Wolf's "Paleo Matrix", AND an exclusive** recipe from Well Fed! That's a $60 value*** for only $19.95!

Send you payment now!

PaleoHackers Grokling Membership
[*address deleted*]

* Individual results not guaranteed. Some people report adverse reactions including loss of allergies, weight loss, improved muscle tone, improved stool quality, lessened gut irritation, and other unapproved results.

** Exclusive to anyone who has internet access.

*** If you actually buy Well Fed by Melissa Joulwan like you should.

3
A968087cc1dd66d480749c02e4619ef4

(20436)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:15 PM

Grokkling? Is that caveman-improv comedy?

  1. losing grains and sugar
  2. lose the veg oils and packaged foods

You should also drop soy, peanuts and other beans - but some are okay with lentils and such - or WAPF soaking/fermenting...

That's about it. You might want to exeriment with no dairy, but it's okay if you don't.

Anything beyond that is tweaking/customizing for your own sake.

==

If you need to start slowly, one step at a time, use Dr. Kurt G. Harris' getting started list. Just work your way down the list as you can - and you can stop where you want to.

http://www.archevore.com/get-started/

A968087cc1dd66d480749c02e4619ef4

(20436)

on January 18, 2012
at 02:23 PM

You could probably add avoid toxic things like transfat, MSG and yellow #5, but losing packaged food should take care of those for the most part. Then you could start looking at food quality. Ya know, grass fed versus grain fed beef and stuff like that. But again, that's tweaking. 80% or more of the benefit is from the first two things in the above list. Unless you happen to be extremely sensitive to a particular food and it's causing a health issue...

2
6cdc6b1e75690cfcc4804a6c9eaa910a

(2171)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:46 PM

It's not about compliance, it's about your Reputation score....anything over 650 qualifies you as a Grokkling.

6cdc6b1e75690cfcc4804a6c9eaa910a

(2171)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:47 PM

...and yes, I gave you the upvote to get you there...cheers!

2
96bf58d8c6bd492dc5b8ae46203fe247

(37227)

on January 17, 2012
at 05:19 PM

Losing grains and sugar is a big piece.

Next I'd say avoid things in bags and packages with lists of ingredients. That's not 100%, of course, because some whole foods--or whole foods with 1 or 2 other foods--added are packaged for convenience and are fine. Minimally processed pork rinds come in a bag but there's no "list."

Manufacturing is bad in general. Olive and coconut oils are fine but the less processed the better. Industrial seed oils like corn, peanut, safflower and canola are to be avoided like the plague.

Legumes should typically be avoided but there are a few exceptions such as well fermented things or very green things like green beans and spring peas.

If you eat some dairy, try to find products without stabilizers, thickeners and preservatives.

If you approach all food sources with this mindset, it gets pretty easy.

1372f4b0e01dad65d75b0eb7ac3ba6f8

(35)

on February 04, 2012
at 04:34 AM

What about Miso soup with green onions?

1
D5a4ff096a452a84a772efa0e6bc626e

(2486)

on January 17, 2012
at 07:56 PM

If you're just going to dabble, I like Archevore's Get Startedlist where he prioritizes the various steps. They're all actually useful, though...I thought for months that decreasing PUFAs was incidental, but durned if I don't feel better with less pork/almond products/chicken fat. Whatever level you can sustain for now is great though- healthier is healthier!

1
5a8b4b0567fe7c510d220cb83843b4a9

on January 17, 2012
at 06:25 PM

I say, go full out. Try it for a month and see how you feel. BE committed. Then decide what you will add back from there. I was toying with this lifestyle from a primal standpoint for the last year and a half. I am currently doing the Whole30 challenge, which is strict paleo for 30 days. I feel great! I don't miss dairy. I have found substitutes. I don't try to paleo-fy foods, I am just enjoying real whole foods. I am taking the time for food, and its been really enjoyable. If youw ant to try it out, you can find the info here. Youc an also find tons of resources of how and why you should go paleo. http://whole9life.com/category/whole-30/

1
C56baa1b4f39839c018180bf63226f7d

on January 17, 2012
at 05:29 PM

  1. Eliminate grains and sugar
  2. ?
  3. Profit!

Real answer: step 2 is a lot of waiting. You need 6-10 weeks for your body to shake it out, heal, recover, and find its natural metabolism again. When you get past that point you can start tweaking and looking for ways to optimize, like changing your carb levels, building muscle with HIIT, eliminating nightshades/dairy/other pro-inflammatory foods.

Also, step 1 should also lose PUFA-rich seed oil, as much as feasible. You can get all the PUFA you need from fish and meat.

0
Medium avatar

on January 17, 2012
at 06:05 PM

You must not only comply. You must submit. You must conform. You must confess to having transgressed the unwritten law. You must be prepared to pay the full price. Unless of course you can get it retail. What is "it"? So clever, your feigned distraction.

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