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Losing weight and living with non-paleo parents

Answered on September 12, 2014
Created January 06, 2013 at 9:22 PM

My parents are not exactly supportive of this paleo diet. I've been trying to desperately lose weight, and I fell off the wagon and had 2 weeks of binges, followed by Christmas. So yeah, I've put weight on. I'm back on paleo now and I was feeling good until my parents started making comments.

For example, my dad is trying to lose weight. So for breakfast this morning he had "2 slices of whole wheat toast and two poached eggs" with 2 glasses of orange juice. I knew I wasn't getting lunch, so I had 4 eggs and 4 slices of bacon.

"That's a bit excessive, isn't it?" "Too much food for a teenager, that is. I'm a grown man and even I wouldn't eat that much." "I thought you were trying to lose weight?"

They say stuff like that all the time. It makes me feel guilty about whatever I put in my mouth.

They almost took my butter off me 'cos they watched a Hairy Bikers programme and they cut down on fat and lost 3 stone. I told them I couldn't believe that they'd rather listen to the TV than countless studies, but they totally dismiss everything on the internet. They won't read MDA, they won't let me buy paleo books. They think that everyone on the internet is a crook. So when I try and counter their argument with something from the internet (where else am I going to get paleo info from?) they say "You believe anything you see on that bloody internet!"

Just now they told me off for my breakfast. They started a massive argument where they spewed useless facts, like "just cut down on your food and do more exercise and you'll lose weight!!" and from my dad "I'M a grown man and I only have 3 eggs." (my dad drinks protein shakes mid morning and has a body fat percentage of 31) and my mam even went as far as to compare me to the girl who lives in the same street as me, who is well over 200 pounds. I'm 5'4 and 150 pounds.

They say that they just care about my health, but I'm healthier than ever, and all they can go on about is my weight. I don't get as many colds, my skin is better, my hair is amazing, I'm not as tired. But I'm fatter. I meekly suggested that possibly some of it was to do with puberty, since I've went up like 3 bra sizes in 8 months. But they said "I thought you wanted to be healthy! Being overweight is NOT healthy!"

I don't know what to do. They won't listen to me. They accuse me of believing what I want to believe, yet they slag off fat like it's going out of fashion. They judge my food intake. If I have something that's "not paleo" it's "falling off the bandwagon" I feel so controlled and I can't do a thing. They've made me never want to eat ever again.

I can't change their minds, so can someone please help me lose weight? I've started running. What I normally eat is: 3 eggs in 25g of butter, 2 bits of bacon, a salad, then a palm sized meat and 2 veg, in a day. I've also started running and will start kettlebells on Tuesday.

They also say I'm so angry all the time and it's making them sad. I don't feel like I can do anything right. I kind of just want to disappear right now, haha.

Sorry for the rant. There was a question in there, somewhere. I'm just really upset and not thinking straight. And I know they love me, I just can't listen to them when they talk like that.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on January 27, 2013
at 03:49 PM

Ooohhh.... This is considered fatism around here... Be sensitive to overweight people. Of course they know what's best. Being overweight is suggestive of NOTHING! (Sarcasm)

513587882111828e619d66f2a146b627

(198)

on January 27, 2013
at 02:27 PM

+1 "family can really suck eggs". Or my corollary "family is over-rated"

66a7ef84ed129bba4ea2dc3aea26f67f

on January 06, 2013
at 09:51 PM

The binges were whenever my parents were out, so about 4 full blown binges. The rest was just eating junk whenever I could

Cb9a270955e2c277a02c4a4b5dad10b5

(10979)

on January 06, 2013
at 09:25 PM

When you say you had two weeks of binges, does that mean you binged for two weeks straight?

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12 Answers

3
F891e7b1cbbbe3838c9bba9ff78aa3ed

on January 06, 2013
at 10:04 PM

Can I suggest a mean comment? Have you pointed out to them they are overweight and obviously struggling with it so they might not be the best to give you advice? I mean you are a product of their environment at this point so a lot of the "blame" lies on them for you being overweight. (Although I really don't think 150 at 5'4" is but it is all how you feel) You won't live there forever just do the best you can do at this point! They should be happy you are learning about nutrition instead of just eating whatever you wanted.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on January 27, 2013
at 03:49 PM

Ooohhh.... This is considered fatism around here... Be sensitive to overweight people. Of course they know what's best. Being overweight is suggestive of NOTHING! (Sarcasm)

2
B9896355c7cfc3aafcb589c97f9c8bc9

on January 27, 2013
at 11:15 AM

ebrady, do one thing for me hun, stop and take a breathe. i am 20 and still living with my family for several reasons. i know how family can get.

from the 98 i'm guessing you are about 13/14 yrs old. let me tell you something, i've been 5' 6" and 245 pounds since sixth grade. only now am i getting my weight down {currently down to 220 pounds over 2yrs non-paleo} so you are ahead of the curve of most on that. and in the long run it will save you alot.

try your best not to let your family's judgement get the better of you. it is very hard to do, but if you can soldier on and show them up when you lose the weight then you can feel that much better about it when you do.

wish i had something better to say or add. family can really suck eggs.

513587882111828e619d66f2a146b627

(198)

on January 27, 2013
at 02:27 PM

+1 "family can really suck eggs". Or my corollary "family is over-rated"

1
32652cb696b75182cb121009ee4edea3

(5802)

on January 06, 2013
at 09:54 PM

It's all in the way you phrase it. Start calling it "whole foods" eating instead of paleo. Ask for some veggies with breakfast (we often eat sweet bell peppers or saut??ed kale with breakfast). Who can argue with veggies and whole foods? :) At this point, I would stop arguing with them and just buckle down on improving your own health. When they see you changing, then you can explain why. The phase of life you are in is THE HARDEST!!! Hang in there. Your body is rebelling, and you have no control over your own life ... it gets so much better in just a few years, I promise!

BTW, I don't think 5'4" and 150 lb is that heavy - I'm 5'5" and 160 lb, and even though I'd love to lose another 20 lb, I have a trim waist and good fitness (I do crossfit). Keep making good choices as best you can - if you are already learning about paleo as a teen, you are setting yourself up well for life. Don't worry about falling off the wagon; everyone does it.

1
56046474e7622a04057c579470482133

on January 06, 2013
at 09:40 PM

I feel your pain. My parents are great, and I adore then, but not paleo... Over the holidays they feed my kids... Juice is paleo, thin crust pizza is more paleo, chocolate milk is a paleo treat..... I got them the book it starts with the food for Christmas. Hopefully they will read it. Educate, educate, educate. I feel your pain.

0
C8a5c6d2804326646bb274e491f7f21b

on January 07, 2013
at 08:19 PM

Depending on your age consider getting a part time job to bring in more paleo foods or to allow you more options may help

0
61b5a48b4609fc0aeedd36b30a67cfa3

on January 07, 2013
at 06:01 PM

Keep working at ! Don't get too upset when you don't eat paleo ! And educate your parents and involve them as much as possible. Enjoy your working out and the weight loss will come. Hang in there and the fact you worry about your health now is great

0
F3d7331e70a00d4f677752e6312da086

on January 07, 2013
at 08:16 AM

Stick with it. Maybe try sitting down and talking with them away from the kitchen and when there is not food happening. That seems to be a trigger for the friction. Try to explain how you feel without getting emotional - I am the Mom of a 15 year old and I know that it can be difficult, just do the best you can. Don't make it about the weight focus more your health.

Hang in there :)

0
089dd41b18fbb95ebb5347cded708d98

(5635)

on January 07, 2013
at 05:10 AM

i think you should just stick it out. until your parents actually see physical results, they will probably be morons to you. some people are just assholes and it's usually your family. my dad has always criticized my diet and now i just don't talk to him.

i'm 5'4" as well and typically eat 1600 to 1800 calories a day. this keeps me really full. i mostly eat meat, fat, and dates since they are all high cal.

0
197651282ddd8d675b974ee811d2269e

on January 07, 2013
at 04:50 AM

I'm with the others and would encourage you to stick with it. I suspect that you will soon have great results and your parents will have to reconsider their diets. BTW, both of my teens (daughter and son) eat way more meat than you do and they are thin. I would suggest that you eat some sort of protein with your lunch and maybe a bit more meat with your dinner, to ward off cravings for junk food. Good luck, learn to pick yourself up after falling down, and you will do great!

0
B2cadbf43bddfbb523b8a53155656188

on January 06, 2013
at 11:12 PM

I know it may be difficult to defy your parents, and hard to stick to paleo if they are the ones who are grocery shopping and cooking, but the only advice I can offer is to stick with it!!! I have encountered SO MANY doubters, haters, defensive people along my journey and I no longer care what anyone else thinks of me or my "crazy diet". In fact, I have learned that the people who could benefit the most from this way of eating are the people who are always the most defensive and judging. Your parents may need to see results before they believe you so stick with it and prove them wrong!

0
D09082bfdf314165ffe5111048db79c8

on January 06, 2013
at 10:04 PM

It is so hard to communicate why you think the paleo diet is right for you. I would suggest finding some resources and literature you can print out and hand your parents to help you justify your actions. You are welcome to use my 6 tips for paleo weight loss to help you on your journey: http://www.threedietsonedinner.com/2012/07/the-paleo-diet-for-weight-loss.html Your parents will come around. There is nothing wrong with choosing unprocessed, whole foods over the factory-tainted, preservative and chemical laden foods that come in pretty packaging. Lead by example. They will come around. Even if they don't start eating paleo, they'll respect your intentions to be a healthier, happier person.

0
7e36094a0f7a2fbad24290225405220b

(2064)

on January 06, 2013
at 09:33 PM

It's a shame it's become focussed on food and not health. If you could persuade them that you were not going to diet but just eat healthily maybe they would lay off you a bit and you could just get on with eating what you want. I'm not sure how you would go about taking the emphasis off the food, though. Could you eat at a different time in the morning? Maybe say you are taking an early class and be fnished before they get up? Pack a paleo lunch and then eat the protein and veg in the evening?

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