1

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How do I stop caring about the scale?

Answered on August 19, 2014
Created February 18, 2011 at 4:16 PM

I've been paleo for two months now and finally after about a month I have started to feel amazing. I have a lot more energy, I feel clear minded, stronger. I love the freedom this way of eating is giving me. I also am amazed at the quality of the community and resources available and to top it off I've put my son on Paleo and seen his life-time digestive issues improve.

But I haven't lost a pound :( I don't want to care about this but I do. Every time I step on the scale I feel so depressed and start negative self-talk which is so counter-productive. I've tried not weighing myself, but I am curious and part of me is scared that if I don't track my weight I might gain back all the weight I lost before paleo (it took me a year of really hard work and calorie counting to lose 25 pounds).

How do I let go and trust this way of eating?

and in case it matters: I am 35 years old 145 5'4" and my goal has been to get to 135 for years. I eat pretty strict paleo (cheats are a little heavy cream and some wine), no fruit, limited nuts. I've just started some intermittent fasting. I do crossfit 3 times a week, yoga once a week.

Medium avatar

(39831)

on February 18, 2011
at 11:16 PM

Oh yeah, if you have strength goals, then you need to throw that low weight target right out the window.

50637dfd7dc7a7e811d82283f4f5fd10

(5838)

on February 18, 2011
at 10:04 PM

I'd say the scale is the least thing you should be worrying about if that's the case. If you wanna look like them, you need some serious muscle.

5d0283f9cf2480374a0b7df56b7f3d9b

(418)

on February 18, 2011
at 09:31 PM

you know I think I'm going to do this!!!

5d0283f9cf2480374a0b7df56b7f3d9b

(418)

on February 18, 2011
at 09:19 PM

my goal is to be as strong as the girl's on this site http://rippedfuel.tumblr.com/

Aead76beb5fc7b762a6b4ddc234f6051

(15239)

on February 18, 2011
at 07:57 PM

thank you so much, heather. thank you. i really needed to hear that, too.

5d0283f9cf2480374a0b7df56b7f3d9b

(418)

on February 18, 2011
at 05:56 PM

This is what I've been really focusing on lately - I have some specific lifting goals and I'm really trying to make these my priority and not the scale. But somehow I keep getting sucked down by the numbers on the scale

5d0283f9cf2480374a0b7df56b7f3d9b

(418)

on February 18, 2011
at 05:47 PM

Thanks so much - I think this is exactly what I needed to hear :) I can't believe how ingrained the negativity of weight is. I know I feel better, I know I'm happier and I am really excited about getting stronger.

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12 Answers

6
07c86972a3bea0b0dc17752e9d2f5642

on February 18, 2011
at 04:59 PM

I have had issues with this for years. It even led to some borderline behavior in terms of disordered eating. I gave up before the over-exercising and under-eating got completely out of hand, but it did screw my health up to the point where my hormones are out of whack and I haven't had my period in 10 months. I'm working with my doctor now on this. The ONLY thing that matters is your health and happiness. That is it. I lost about 60 lbs a couple of years ago. Before then I thought that if I could just lose 20lbs I would look so much better and my life would change. Well losing weight did make me happy, and when I kept on losing weight, it was wonderful, but I never stopped thinking that I was unattractive, I never stopped worrying about my weight. Women are trained from birth to think that they can never do enough to look okay. You have issues with the number on the scale. It is never going to matter what that number is, you will always be unhappy with it. You have to get out of that way of thinking. Seek out counseling if that might help. Talk to someone you trust about it. Stop reading women's magazines and don't participate in the negative body talk that women do together. It's poisonous and bizarre when you really think about it. Listen to what you yourself are saying. You feel healthy and better than ever and you aren't willing to trust that because you body isn't a certain number that you arbitrarily decided would make your ego happy. You have to be your own best friend and take care of yourself. What if your mother or sister or daughter was saying the same negative things about themselves? What would you tell them? What if a stranger was saying them to you? Would you stand for it? If you wouldn't let a stranger insult you that way, why would you do it to yourself? Be healthy and happy. Forcing your body to lose weight is not going to do either for you. Focus on getting strong. Would you rather weigh a certain number, or be a total bad-ass? I wanna be a bad-ass.

5d0283f9cf2480374a0b7df56b7f3d9b

(418)

on February 18, 2011
at 05:47 PM

Thanks so much - I think this is exactly what I needed to hear :) I can't believe how ingrained the negativity of weight is. I know I feel better, I know I'm happier and I am really excited about getting stronger.

Aead76beb5fc7b762a6b4ddc234f6051

(15239)

on February 18, 2011
at 07:57 PM

thank you so much, heather. thank you. i really needed to hear that, too.

4
50637dfd7dc7a7e811d82283f4f5fd10

(5838)

on February 18, 2011
at 04:23 PM

I never reached my goal until the batteries on my scale died. No joke. If you are weighing yourself constantly, you will second guess yourself all the time, did you eat too much, not enough, too frequent, etc.. all these do is create uneccesary stress. Eat soundly, judge your progress on how you feel, how your clothes fit. It takes time. Be happy, get good sleep any try not to worry about the scale.

Best of luck. Report back when you get to 135 :)

2
86e631c6164bfdf4221434e2d38125b3

(414)

on February 18, 2011
at 08:02 PM

There are some great answers here!

My suggestion is to take a pair of jeans that didn't fit well before you started, and try them on every week or two. They will fit differently as you gain muscle and burn fat, which is probably what you're doing.

I've found that as I get closer to my goal weight (135 - same as you!), the weight comes off more slowly, but my muscles are emerging and my clothes are getting looser. I was "stuck" at 139-140 for a month, and finally got to 138 with some IF and training fasted. Good luck!

2
Bb1ba0d71083ceaecd3a3b405a977454

on February 18, 2011
at 05:02 PM

You body composition can begin (and already has, no doubt) to change with no measurable change in mass as it switches over from carbohydrate to fat burning. Don't worry about the weight and instead focus on the positive aspects of the change in lifestyle (energy, great food etc.) and let the rest take care of itself.

2
C96b24b2e61e9583b2666a11d5fca6b1

on February 18, 2011
at 04:36 PM

Start lifting weights and focus on getting stronger. Then you'll see both a) results in the mirror, and b) you look better /even though/ weight increases.

That should help you shake it off.

5d0283f9cf2480374a0b7df56b7f3d9b

(418)

on February 18, 2011
at 05:56 PM

This is what I've been really focusing on lately - I have some specific lifting goals and I'm really trying to make these my priority and not the scale. But somehow I keep getting sucked down by the numbers on the scale

2
F910318b9aa27b91bcf7881f39b9eabe

on February 18, 2011
at 04:29 PM

Throw it in the trash or give it away to someone else. Problem solved :)

5d0283f9cf2480374a0b7df56b7f3d9b

(418)

on February 18, 2011
at 09:31 PM

you know I think I'm going to do this!!!

1
7e746be2f0e550a8cd7df881322ae705

on February 19, 2011
at 02:26 AM

I stayed at my first goal weight for a year. My trainer suggested it after two years of up/down. It ended up being exactly what I needed. Maintenance isn't always easy. Mentally it's a completely different place than losing. During that year I made new strength gains, improved my body composition and ran my first triathlon. Once we were pretty comfortable that I was secure at this weight, we made plans for a push to my final goal weight.

It took 12 weeks of total focus and buckling down, but I did finally hit my true goal weight. Give yourself some time to enjoy being where you are at, then you can decide if you really need to go lower.

I do continue to weigh myself and did during the year of maintenance. For me, it's essential to stay on track. I don't weigh myself every day and I try not to but too much importance of 2lbs up/down.

1
39a1a0bc7855c084ac59df60fdf9c0dd

(1505)

on February 18, 2011
at 10:41 PM

I echo everyone here and urge you to NOT count calories. I would add, though, that for me giving up all drinking is key to weight loss. Sounds like you're just sipping from time to time, so probably no big deal. But for me, for whatever reason, it just locks up my weght loss. I know that isn't true for a lot of people, but for me it is gospel.

1
Medium avatar

on February 18, 2011
at 08:06 PM

Best approach is to figure out what your goals actually are. If your goal is to be healthy and fit, then you are already there. If your goal is to arbitrarily qualify for a particular weight class, then you may have starve yourself, lose muscle and put your health at risk.

50637dfd7dc7a7e811d82283f4f5fd10

(5838)

on February 18, 2011
at 10:04 PM

I'd say the scale is the least thing you should be worrying about if that's the case. If you wanna look like them, you need some serious muscle.

Medium avatar

(39831)

on February 18, 2011
at 11:16 PM

Oh yeah, if you have strength goals, then you need to throw that low weight target right out the window.

5d0283f9cf2480374a0b7df56b7f3d9b

(418)

on February 18, 2011
at 09:19 PM

my goal is to be as strong as the girl's on this site http://rippedfuel.tumblr.com/

1
04293f705870e1837b8670d3c1cd5f67

on February 18, 2011
at 07:25 PM

A friend of mine has this problem, the "scale" and weight issue. I always tell her that muscle weighs more than fat. So, she really can't gage her weight strictly on the scale. We wear the same size jeans, and I weight 10# less, why? because has heavier muscles, she works out more than me and lifts heavy weights. I know she is stronger! but yet, there is a 10# weight difference.

I am wondering do you fit into clothes any better? I never weight myself. There is just no need to because I don't really care. But my friend, she weighs herself everyday. I think its a body image problem which I don't have. I look in the mirror, and think, "I look good." she looks in the mirror and thinks the opposite.

I think you are on the right track with your diet and fitness. I have been lacto-paleo for a year. My girlfriend is 5'4" also, she weighs 135. It just takes little more time.

I feel that the more fat I eat, the more weight I lose. I have about 1/2 cup cream in the morning with my coffee. More cream with herbal tea. I am not trying to lose weight so I need to up my carbs. You will get there!

0
C22b71e29cc2d4019e31cc41b9322edd

(185)

on February 18, 2011
at 04:59 PM

not sure if this is your issue, but as a paleo crossfitter, I didn't lose any weight until I zoned paleo. I pay attention to eating protein, carbs and fat at EVERY meal. Once I did that, effortless weight loss and management followed - no overeating because no insulin spikes during the day. I don't worry about it anymore and when I do get on the scale, it's consistent because I listen to my body and what it's telling me I need, even if it's a load of nuts! Hope that helps.

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