2

votes

Unsolicited "Observations" and How to evaluate if you are too thin?

Answered on August 19, 2014
Created February 29, 2012 at 7:30 PM

File this under "good problems to have" for most....

I have been eating primally for well over six months now. I am 5'2" and 110 lbs (and holding steady). I feel great, I eat great, I THOUGHT I looked well, and I have been happy with the decision to discontinue a SAD.

However, in the last few weeks, I have gotten quite a bit of unsolicited "observations" such as:

You look too thin

Don't lose any more weight

Next time I see you I want you to have 5 more lbs on you (and that was from my butcher)

So my question is this- am I taking this to heart a little bit too much? Is there some sort of informal litmus test for this? Minimum BMI?

Input would be MUCH appreciated!

32f5749fa6cf7adbeb0b0b031ba82b46

(41747)

on February 29, 2012
at 10:11 PM

Yep yep, family likes to see you fat and sassy more than fit and trim.

91a992db7643b19ccabcf29a30748fd1

(10)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:31 PM

I feel GREAT- just wanted to make sure I wasn't in a "Paleo Euphoria" and not able to see the forest for the trees.

91a992db7643b19ccabcf29a30748fd1

(10)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:30 PM

PERFECT response!

91a992db7643b19ccabcf29a30748fd1

(10)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:29 PM

I think I will absolutely ask for 5 extra lbs of meat next time- wish I was quicker on the draw and would have used that line already!

91a992db7643b19ccabcf29a30748fd1

(10)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:27 PM

I love my bacon, but I am certainly not dreaming about it. :) I'm well fed and happy- and it seems that's all the proof I need. Thanks!

91a992db7643b19ccabcf29a30748fd1

(10)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:26 PM

I feel great- however after hearing these statements repeatedly I wondered if I was missing something? I LOVE the retort- will add it to the arsenal- thanks!

76c885d7d27e6c83542ea493ca866dcd

(2178)

on February 29, 2012
at 07:44 PM

my thoughts exactly

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8 Answers

5
5af4bc9d2c390b0bcad9524f149c1b4f

(1101)

on February 29, 2012
at 07:35 PM

"Next time I see you, I want you to have 5 less lbs on you."

See how they like it.

91a992db7643b19ccabcf29a30748fd1

(10)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:30 PM

PERFECT response!

4
Ce41c230e8c2a4295db31aec3ef4b2ab

(32564)

on February 29, 2012
at 07:37 PM

You sound fine.

They are looking at you through the lens of either jealousy or eyes that are simply accustomed to looking at overweight people and thinking they are "normaL".

I get the same crap from my family, all of whom are overweight. Ignore them.

76c885d7d27e6c83542ea493ca866dcd

(2178)

on February 29, 2012
at 07:44 PM

my thoughts exactly

32f5749fa6cf7adbeb0b0b031ba82b46

(41747)

on February 29, 2012
at 10:11 PM

Yep yep, family likes to see you fat and sassy more than fit and trim.

3
F631b2996a2a9a098437551ed65459f2

on February 29, 2012
at 09:09 PM

CayLani--I am 5'2" also. When I'm being a good cavegirl, I weigh between 102 and 106 pounds. Everyone says all of those same things to me.

I think it is sad that people can no longer recognize normal as far as bodyweight is concerned. So many people are so overweight that normal has become the new "too thin". My shoulders are broad and muscled ( I wear a size 8 women's shirt) and my hips and butt are narrow and muscular (size two pants). I have a small tummy pooch, partly fat and partly skin from once having weighed 176 pounds. I am fifty years old and feel better than I did in my 20s. I will accept from no one that I am too thin. Love some of the retorts ("Really? You don't." is my favorite). Ignore these people, they are ignorant of true health and of social mores. I agree with the other posters--How do you look and feel to yourself?

By the way, I never have done a 12 step program, but I am told that it is common for addicts and alcoholics to have their recovery efforts sabotaged in this same way by well-meaning friends and family members. I find it interesting that recovering from a crappy diet shows the same dynamic, don't you?

3
Ef9f83cb4e1826261a44c173f733789e

on February 29, 2012
at 07:44 PM

I would take it as a compliment. I look forward to having this problem.

Next time I see you I want you to have 5 more lbs on you (and that was from my butcher)

Knee jerk responses off the top of my head:

"Ok, give me 5 lbs of free meat and I'll see what I can do."
"Why, do you have a fat fetish?"
...or just walk in with a 5 lb dumbbell around your neck.

91a992db7643b19ccabcf29a30748fd1

(10)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:29 PM

I think I will absolutely ask for 5 extra lbs of meat next time- wish I was quicker on the draw and would have used that line already!

2
9140810eb28b318fb081c1f98c0989c8

(459)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:50 PM

Remember, the average size now is a 14 (in America). 5'2" 110# is definitely within healthy norms, depending on your frame. Take a picture of yourself. Compare your arms to a current picture of Angelina Jolie's... are your bones sticking out like hers? Really, honestly? No? You're probably fine. No need to be snarky in return, just smile and go about your business. If a particular person presses it too much, just ask why they're so invested in your weight. Personally, I think it's just because we're all used to people around us being.... padded. ^_^

2
52af669cec3e4d2a2b414faea3de2877

(547)

on February 29, 2012
at 07:40 PM

Do you feel healthy? Are you content with your appearance? Do you think you need to put on weight? Are the people who are saying these things overweight or out of shape? Were you previously heavier, and they're simply unused to seeing you thinner? Quite frequently people will say things like that to people who've lost weight, even if they're still significantly overweight, because they think it's something you need to hear for whatever reason. It has something to do, I think, with people associating any sort of diet with the desire to be thin for aesthetic reasons, or alternatively associating thinness with an obsession with body image and low self esteem.

If it ever feels insulting, spiteful, or you're simply getting tired of it, nothing works better than a well worded, if slightly passive-agressive retort. "You look too thin." Really? You don't.

91a992db7643b19ccabcf29a30748fd1

(10)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:26 PM

I feel great- however after hearing these statements repeatedly I wondered if I was missing something? I LOVE the retort- will add it to the arsenal- thanks!

2
F92e4ca55291c3f3096a3d4d3d854986

(11698)

on February 29, 2012
at 07:40 PM

You're at a BMI of 20 which is perfectly fine. Lower than 19 is when you get into danger territory. That being said, everyone has a different set point (or set range), so many women couldn't stay at 20 without starving themselves. But if you feel satisfied after your meals, aren't preoccupied with food, dreaming about it, constantly suppressing urges to eat or are cold all the time, if you have energy, are meeting your nutritional needs, and are still menstruating, then I think you're probably fine.

91a992db7643b19ccabcf29a30748fd1

(10)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:27 PM

I love my bacon, but I am certainly not dreaming about it. :) I'm well fed and happy- and it seems that's all the proof I need. Thanks!

1
8487a2f7fb8be0a568275667af0794c8

on February 29, 2012
at 07:35 PM

If you feel good, are in good health and have no disordered views of yourself. I feel its more power to you. We have in todays society been conditioned to accept being large or larger is a norm. Your fit, beautiful and strong, people are going to be jealous.If we look back 100 years people were much smaller.

91a992db7643b19ccabcf29a30748fd1

(10)

on February 29, 2012
at 08:31 PM

I feel GREAT- just wanted to make sure I wasn't in a "Paleo Euphoria" and not able to see the forest for the trees.

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