4

votes

Fearful of the future....

Answered on August 19, 2014
Created January 28, 2013 at 3:53 PM

I took up a strict Paleo diet about four weeks ago. Experienced the expected- flu like symptoms, weakness, lack of stamina in training. And suddenly that all went away and I started feeling great. Yesterday, a chef friend of ours invited us to his restaurant, where he proceeded to prepare a Chef's Table menu for us (ie, we couldn't order anything, he just started cooking courses). Fortunately these were small courses but there were seven of them. For the MOST part it was ok- lots of fish and beef- however, a number where prepared with bread crumbs, there were wheat based noodles (about 1/3 of a cup), some cream sauce, and a fried sugar pear thing. Plus wine pairings. Last night I felt AWFUL. I had terrible irritable bowel, pains, actual reflux. I had hot flashes, couldn't sleep. Now I am afraid for my future. I don't want to be THAT person who makes excuses about what I can and cannot eat when being entertained. I also don't want to make a scene by not eating. I don't want to give up Paleo, because I feel so good. Anyone have similar lifestyle/experiences and any work arounds or ideas?

35ba1f50dad25c85ac1aa2599fe5c5cb

(2485)

on January 29, 2013
at 05:24 PM

Yup. Grow up. You either say to yourself "I'm going to eat this now and it's going to make me miserable for a few days and that's worth it" or you speak up and let the chef know what you need. Neither thing makes you "THAT person"... you're just being honest. I have food restrictions and I often host BBQs for people with even MORE food restrictions and there are ways to be creative around it and still entertain and enjoy your friends. A chef's choice tasting menu where you don't communicate with the chef is not that scenario.

06bf7b92d77f1ac1d8e3dc9d539d8254

(1649)

on January 29, 2013
at 03:48 PM

meh, kids shouldn't be taught that they should never indulge in cake. rather they should be taught that cake is an indulgence. a trim parent eating a piece of cake at a birthday party is setting a great example.. hardly the opposite.

32652cb696b75182cb121009ee4edea3

(5802)

on January 29, 2013
at 01:25 AM

That was hilarious. Pretty true too.

E253f8ac1d139bf4d0bfb44debd1db21

on January 28, 2013
at 11:07 PM

once in a while you have to endure .. consider it hormetic

510bdda8988ed0d4b0ec0b738b4edb73

(20888)

on January 28, 2013
at 11:02 PM

+10. I read that when it first came out years ago, and totally forgot about it. Thanks for the repost!

2e777bbcd49262eb31a24f821abec6bc

(1974)

on January 28, 2013
at 07:18 PM

Just to add another perspective to this... in my opinion, a very occasional cheat meal is not going to affect my health drastically long term. So is it worth cheating and just avoiding gluten to have a normal social life? For me, yes. For others, no. I think that this is something you have to personally decide on, based on your own values. Either way, focus on long term health and a healthy lifestyle and you will be a healthy person.

510bdda8988ed0d4b0ec0b738b4edb73

(20888)

on January 28, 2013
at 05:25 PM

Came here to say this. It's your health and your life. You get to choose, do you want to be sick so that you can "fit in" or are you going to be strong and not be afraid to be different so that you can be healthy. I know what choice I make, only you can choose your path.

2e777bbcd49262eb31a24f821abec6bc

(1974)

on January 28, 2013
at 04:57 PM

i agree that the gluten probably was what gave you trouble. When I cheat with other stuff, I might get a slightly irritated stomach. When I cheat with gluten though, I have the symptoms you described. I have learned to say that I have problems with gluten and to turn down the items with it. I eat everything else. No one judges me or questions me on this.

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8 Answers

9
32be195157f00ad15a933b8bb333dcc4

(379)

on January 28, 2013
at 04:03 PM

Just say you are allergic to gluten.

A chef doesn't want you to eat his food an spend a few days in horrible pain. Neither do your friends. They will understand. Depending on who they are it may be easier to leave it at allergies instead of going into how you are paleo.

2e777bbcd49262eb31a24f821abec6bc

(1974)

on January 28, 2013
at 04:57 PM

i agree that the gluten probably was what gave you trouble. When I cheat with other stuff, I might get a slightly irritated stomach. When I cheat with gluten though, I have the symptoms you described. I have learned to say that I have problems with gluten and to turn down the items with it. I eat everything else. No one judges me or questions me on this.

7
Ebb10603524dd22621c1155dd7ddf106

(19150)

on January 28, 2013
at 04:32 PM

"I don't want to be THAT person who makes excuses about what I can and cannot eat when being entertained. I also don't want to make a scene by not eating. I don't want to give up Paleo, because I feel so good."

I hate to sound harsh, but there's no otherway to say this: grow up.

I don't mean don't complain, and I don't mean not to seek out help for something that is concerning you. Look at the portion of your question that I quoted above. You have desires that are completely at odds with each other. Choose one of them, go with it, and you'll find the internal strife will go away.

Also, people will not care or notice at all or enough to care that you aren't eating something served to you. Plenty of people don't eat specific foods for lots of reasons, not the least of which is simply preference. (Granted, going to a beer festival or bread experience of some kind is probably not going to work.) Is seeming like a person that enjoys eating wheat really more important to you than not being in pain?

Make a choice - it's yours to make. Good luck!

510bdda8988ed0d4b0ec0b738b4edb73

(20888)

on January 28, 2013
at 05:25 PM

Came here to say this. It's your health and your life. You get to choose, do you want to be sick so that you can "fit in" or are you going to be strong and not be afraid to be different so that you can be healthy. I know what choice I make, only you can choose your path.

2e777bbcd49262eb31a24f821abec6bc

(1974)

on January 28, 2013
at 07:18 PM

Just to add another perspective to this... in my opinion, a very occasional cheat meal is not going to affect my health drastically long term. So is it worth cheating and just avoiding gluten to have a normal social life? For me, yes. For others, no. I think that this is something you have to personally decide on, based on your own values. Either way, focus on long term health and a healthy lifestyle and you will be a healthy person.

35ba1f50dad25c85ac1aa2599fe5c5cb

(2485)

on January 29, 2013
at 05:24 PM

Yup. Grow up. You either say to yourself "I'm going to eat this now and it's going to make me miserable for a few days and that's worth it" or you speak up and let the chef know what you need. Neither thing makes you "THAT person"... you're just being honest. I have food restrictions and I often host BBQs for people with even MORE food restrictions and there are ways to be creative around it and still entertain and enjoy your friends. A chef's choice tasting menu where you don't communicate with the chef is not that scenario.

4
Ae8946707ddebf0f0bfbcfc63276d823

(9402)

on January 28, 2013
at 10:56 PM

32652cb696b75182cb121009ee4edea3

(5802)

on January 29, 2013
at 01:25 AM

That was hilarious. Pretty true too.

510bdda8988ed0d4b0ec0b738b4edb73

(20888)

on January 28, 2013
at 11:02 PM

+10. I read that when it first came out years ago, and totally forgot about it. Thanks for the repost!

06bf7b92d77f1ac1d8e3dc9d539d8254

(1649)

on January 29, 2013
at 03:48 PM

meh, kids shouldn't be taught that they should never indulge in cake. rather they should be taught that cake is an indulgence. a trim parent eating a piece of cake at a birthday party is setting a great example.. hardly the opposite.

2
089dd41b18fbb95ebb5347cded708d98

(5635)

on January 28, 2013
at 09:28 PM

you just have to choose whether you want to be in pain or you want to indulge? are some indulgences more worthy of pain than others? that's for you to decide.

i don't go out to restaurants anymore because i don't trust how my food is prepared. does this dampen my social outings? maybe a little, but there are plenty of other things to do besides going out to eat.

1
E35e3d76547b18096a59c90029e7e107

(15613)

on January 29, 2013
at 02:44 PM

Yeh I get exactly these symptoms when I eat gluten. It is not unreasonable to say "I don't eat gluten" or "I'm gluten intolerant." It's pretty common and people can't object, given that you might be a straightforward celiac for all they know.

1
06bf7b92d77f1ac1d8e3dc9d539d8254

on January 28, 2013
at 04:38 PM

Yah, I'm a a food enthusiast.. I travel to distant places to eat at acclaimed restaurants..and such. I just tell the restaurant ahead of time I have a gluten allergy and it all works out. Generally in high end restaurants the cooking oils won't be bad so you dont have to worry about that. Gluten is really the only issue. With sweet courses you really have to make a decision. I personally am not a sugar phobe like most Paleo people, but if you are just take one bite of dessert and be done. As for the wine pairing.. I don't recommend it. I have done it many times and it always ends up making me eat more than I usually would, drink more than I should and feel like shit the next day.

0
B6b2363b89dabe8ef39c071ed6c72dba

on July 26, 2013
at 01:58 PM

People at my office are always shocked when I turn down the birthday cakes, snacks, tacos, etc. It makes matters worse when I joke that I'm trying to maintain my weight, and they say that I'm already so thin, lucky to be thin, etc (they're actually trying to be sweet, but if they only knew how hard it is). Long story: cheat a little if you want to (I do), but don't be scare to politely decline as well.

0
705e66484ed64fe8e188123de398413e

on January 29, 2013
at 12:35 AM

I can relate. The trouble with having a strict diet and then going all-out on a buffet or tasting menu is that you don't know exactly what caused the problem.

Once you've recovered, why not try introducing some of the foods that gave you trouble but only one at a time? See if you can identify the root of the problem.

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