6

votes

how can i get my husband enough calories without making lots of rich desserts that I will eat too?

Answered on September 12, 2014
Created March 29, 2010 at 1:51 AM

This question is asking for advice, actually. My husband and I just went paleo about 6 weeks ago. He quickly lost the small amount of excess bodyfat needed to give him a six pack and some nice muscle definition (definitely a good thing). However, his career keeps him very active and I think he has not been getting enough fat and/or calories as he has been craving sweets.

Not wanting him to loose more weight, I make him lots of paleo or quasi-paleo desserts to satisfy his cravings. The problem is, I then end up eating lots of rich desserts too... I do not need to loose weight (seem to have been blessed with a good metabolism) but for other reasons don't want to be eating sweets that often (insulin spikes, digestion problems, you guys know the deal).

So my question is, how can we eat so that Husband gets enough calories to not loose weight or crave sweets, and I am not tempted to eat or overeat lots of "extras"?

(I already am fairly liberal in lard when cooking, and try to make some eggy breakfast for him tho he doesn't like to eat in the mornings, and I usually pack him a lunch of leftovers or a salad with lots of meat.)

6f0efd477208f51d145bea6d7272256e

(627)

on July 04, 2010
at 04:55 PM

Have you heard of bacon?

Fd35eb89073e3a758066b7fcaad63d7c

(796)

on April 05, 2010
at 12:25 AM

@Dexter, thanks for your detailed answer with practical suggestions. @Ed, I think your right about the IF-- it used to worry about him not eating breakfast (last year when we were training for a marathon and I thought we were supposed to eat 6 times a day) but now if he wants to eat one big meal a day, that seems perfectly reasonable.

93f44e8673d3ea2294cce085ebc96e13

(10502)

on March 30, 2010
at 04:22 AM

@Ed -- no worries. It looks like I may have over-reacted.

06d21b99c58283ce575e36c4ecd4a458

(9948)

on March 29, 2010
at 05:00 PM

@Ed These folk are only into the paleosphere for 6 weeks. I included breakfast in this situation because the husband needs more fat and meat to quell his cravings in the short run. Longer term, IF can be incorporated into the lifestyle and is very easy to do...once the cravings have dissipated. And as you state weightloss on a ketogenic diet and IF will result in weight loss but that is not the objective here. And I suspect these folks are twenty somethings and he needs 3500-4000 Kcals per day to handle his very active profession.

06d21b99c58283ce575e36c4ecd4a458

(9948)

on March 29, 2010
at 04:52 PM

@Ed These folk are only into the paleosphere for 6 weeks. I included breakfast in this situation because the husband needs more fat and meat to quell his cravings in the short run. Longer term, IF can be incorporated into the lifestyle and is very easy to do...once the cravings have dissipated. And as you state weightloss on a ketogenic diet and IF will result in weight loss but that is not the objective here.

6426d61a13689f8f651164b10f121d64

(11478)

on March 29, 2010
at 04:26 PM

@Dexter, I agree with everything you said except about breakfast. Skipping breakfast is just another way of saying intermittent fasting (IF). IF is a healthy and legitimate paleo eating style, although it can lead to further weight loss if one is not careful. According to Richard Nikoley at Free the Animal, IF helped him gain awareness and control over hunger (see the FTA archives). When you have control of your hunger, you are less likely to be seduced by sweet desserts.

100fd85230060e754fc13394eee6d6f1

(18706)

on March 29, 2010
at 03:26 PM

In that case, upping the fat is probably your best strategy, both by choosing fatty cuts, and adding fats. Save fat from cooking and use it liberally.

6426d61a13689f8f651164b10f121d64

(11478)

on March 29, 2010
at 01:03 PM

@Patrik, good point, although that was not my intention. My apologies to Heather. When someone includes background information in their question, I assume it's relevant to the question, or else they wouldn't have included it. I was incorporating that information into my answer. If I get voted down to -3, I'll delete the answer.

18e0cc0f657e81ce5f437e023dd56c2f

(30)

on March 29, 2010
at 12:26 PM

Ed's (and others) point should be well taken. Sweets are not a good way to ad calories. Sugar propagates cravings. It should be eliminated in a paleo/primal diet. If he eats more protein and saturated fats, he will not be hungry, and will not "need" deserts.

Fd35eb89073e3a758066b7fcaad63d7c

(796)

on March 29, 2010
at 08:23 AM

thanks for you answer, but the question isn't so much how to stop eating desserts as how to get enough calories in my husbands diet so he doesn't crave them. I do make sweet potatoes sometimes, maybe i will do that more often.

Fd35eb89073e3a758066b7fcaad63d7c

(796)

on March 29, 2010
at 08:22 AM

thanks for you answer, but the question isn't so much how to stop eating desserts as how to get enough calories in my husbands diet so he doesn't crave them.

Fd35eb89073e3a758066b7fcaad63d7c

(796)

on March 29, 2010
at 08:14 AM

he was very tired, before we started being more liberal with desserts, and also losing weight quickly; so I think he was not getting enough calories. I agree with you that the sugar cravings will settle down when he stops eating sweets (my sweet tooth is much more tame now that i eat paleo) the problem is getting enough calories for his highly active job, especially because he doesn't like to eat breakfast and sometimes skips lunch, too. He has nuts at work which he sometimes eats. He eats a big dinner, but is hungry again a few hours later.

Fd35eb89073e3a758066b7fcaad63d7c

(796)

on March 29, 2010
at 08:03 AM

the dessets i make arn't sweet (say, frozen berries blended with a raw egg into a "sorbet" with whipped cream) but after a rich (fatty) meal something like that makes my stomach hurt.

93f44e8673d3ea2294cce085ebc96e13

(10502)

on March 29, 2010
at 06:15 AM

@Ed -- I down-voted this answer as I thought it too patronizing. e.g. "There's no reason for you to feel obligated to prepare food at home that you feel is harmful to your health." and "Maybe you two should talk about this. "

Eae21abfabb19c4617b2630386994fd9

on March 29, 2010
at 05:20 AM

rich usually means fat which is usually good. Seems like your problem is sweet deserts unless it is rich and sweet (ice cream).

9d43f6873107e17ca4d1a5055aa7a2ad

on March 29, 2010
at 03:26 AM

Voting this up! I'm always satisfied by my meals, but BF complains about being hungry!

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11 Answers

6
6426d61a13689f8f651164b10f121d64

(11478)

on March 29, 2010
at 03:21 AM

Hi Heather. Sweet desserts, even if they're "paleo," may get both you and your husband off track. There's no rule that you have to eat dessert after a meal. Your husband may just need larger portions. Here's a previous thread on avoiding sugar binges: http://paleohacks.com/questions/58/avoiding-the-sugar-binge . Sometimes after you reach your weight loss goals, you can stabilize your weight by adding back some carbs. You husband may need to add some starchy tubers (eg. yams, sweet potatoes) to his diet, maybe some sweet potato fries, as in this thread: http://paleohacks.com/questions/2735/secret-to-sweet-potato-fries . Finally, if your husband insists on eating sweets, he can keep a stash of dark chocolate at work, or at home out of your sight if you don't care to indulge. There's no reason for you to feel obligated to prepare food at home that you feel is harmful to your health. Does your husband insist on these desserts, or are you preparing them on your own? Maybe you two should talk about this.

18e0cc0f657e81ce5f437e023dd56c2f

(30)

on March 29, 2010
at 12:26 PM

Ed's (and others) point should be well taken. Sweets are not a good way to ad calories. Sugar propagates cravings. It should be eliminated in a paleo/primal diet. If he eats more protein and saturated fats, he will not be hungry, and will not "need" deserts.

Fd35eb89073e3a758066b7fcaad63d7c

(796)

on March 29, 2010
at 08:22 AM

thanks for you answer, but the question isn't so much how to stop eating desserts as how to get enough calories in my husbands diet so he doesn't crave them.

93f44e8673d3ea2294cce085ebc96e13

(10502)

on March 29, 2010
at 06:15 AM

@Ed -- I down-voted this answer as I thought it too patronizing. e.g. "There's no reason for you to feel obligated to prepare food at home that you feel is harmful to your health." and "Maybe you two should talk about this. "

Fd35eb89073e3a758066b7fcaad63d7c

(796)

on March 29, 2010
at 08:23 AM

thanks for you answer, but the question isn't so much how to stop eating desserts as how to get enough calories in my husbands diet so he doesn't crave them. I do make sweet potatoes sometimes, maybe i will do that more often.

93f44e8673d3ea2294cce085ebc96e13

(10502)

on March 30, 2010
at 04:22 AM

@Ed -- no worries. It looks like I may have over-reacted.

6426d61a13689f8f651164b10f121d64

(11478)

on March 29, 2010
at 01:03 PM

@Patrik, good point, although that was not my intention. My apologies to Heather. When someone includes background information in their question, I assume it's relevant to the question, or else they wouldn't have included it. I was incorporating that information into my answer. If I get voted down to -3, I'll delete the answer.

3
18e0cc0f657e81ce5f437e023dd56c2f

on March 29, 2010
at 12:24 PM

More fat, less sugar. Seriously...just stop making the sweets. Saute vegetables in coconut oil, make sure you get fattier cuts of meat, and keep hard boiled (omega three) eggs in the fridge for snacks.

3
89e238284ccb95b439edcff9e123671e

(10299)

on March 29, 2010
at 08:25 AM

What worked for me:

use very much fat, really very much, not only fairly much ;-),

and go cold turkey on the sweets (whether sugar or not).

The latter will be hard for about 3 weeks in my experience. Quite surprisingly, by eating less (carbs or sweets), the hunger will be better. And if there are no environmental triggers for sweets, you won't miss them.

(By environmental triggers I mean: smelling something sweet, seeing an ad, talking about sweets, ... )

2
Fa47fe5368e66325865f60a928609145

(961)

on April 03, 2010
at 12:29 PM

No offense intended, but it seems like a bit of a silly question.. If he's not satisfied by his dinner, then he should simply eat more dinner.

When I first started eating together with my bf I thought I'd made enough for dinner and lunch for both of us too. It would have made 4 or 5 meals for me, but he just eats through the whole lot and then asks for some more.. Lots of muscles on my guy.

Also, you won't be too tempted to eat more dinner too, because well- you can only eat so much. Then you're just full!

2
06d21b99c58283ce575e36c4ecd4a458

(9948)

on March 29, 2010
at 04:01 PM

As everyone has said, more meat and more fat, no sugar and very few carbs. American Dietetic Assoc says 60% carbs...an absolutely ideal way to insure food cravings. And not eating breakfast is a sure way to be starved all the time.

Breakfast: 3 eggs fried in coconut oil and butter, 1/4 pound bacon, a small yam microwaved to softness, then sliced thin, then panfried in butter to golden brown. WalMart has a blob of 4 pounds of bacon ends for $5. It doesn't look as pretty as the $3.00 a pound product but it tastes just the same. I microwave it to save time.

Lunch: Send with him 4 hardboiled eggs or deviled eggs, with the yolks deviled with coconut oil in your favorite receipe. 4 oz of hard cheese. We like Tillamook or Cabot White Cheddar. Plus your leftovers.

Dinner: Steak, burger, beef heart, sliced thin and pan fried in coconut oil and dried thyme and basil to medium rare...basically any meat that has some fat on it. Pork, chicken, turkey, fish....at least 16 oz in the evening.

Plus salad with olive oil and vinegar. We use Good Seasons Packet mixed in their hourglass with the EVOO and vinegar. Plus crumble some of the white cheese on the salad. Since seeing the PaleoHacks posting on Nightshades, we have cut them out of our salads and the aches and pains seem to be abating somewhat. http://paleohacks.com/questions/342/has-anyone-seen-benefits-of-avoiding-nighshades

Eating this heavy meat and fat diet for a month will quell his appetite for sweets and will add a few pounds to his frame. Guaranteed! And the guarantee is worth as much as you paid for it.

6426d61a13689f8f651164b10f121d64

(11478)

on March 29, 2010
at 04:26 PM

@Dexter, I agree with everything you said except about breakfast. Skipping breakfast is just another way of saying intermittent fasting (IF). IF is a healthy and legitimate paleo eating style, although it can lead to further weight loss if one is not careful. According to Richard Nikoley at Free the Animal, IF helped him gain awareness and control over hunger (see the FTA archives). When you have control of your hunger, you are less likely to be seduced by sweet desserts.

06d21b99c58283ce575e36c4ecd4a458

(9948)

on March 29, 2010
at 04:52 PM

@Ed These folk are only into the paleosphere for 6 weeks. I included breakfast in this situation because the husband needs more fat and meat to quell his cravings in the short run. Longer term, IF can be incorporated into the lifestyle and is very easy to do...once the cravings have dissipated. And as you state weightloss on a ketogenic diet and IF will result in weight loss but that is not the objective here.

Fd35eb89073e3a758066b7fcaad63d7c

(796)

on April 05, 2010
at 12:25 AM

@Dexter, thanks for your detailed answer with practical suggestions. @Ed, I think your right about the IF-- it used to worry about him not eating breakfast (last year when we were training for a marathon and I thought we were supposed to eat 6 times a day) but now if he wants to eat one big meal a day, that seems perfectly reasonable.

06d21b99c58283ce575e36c4ecd4a458

(9948)

on March 29, 2010
at 05:00 PM

@Ed These folk are only into the paleosphere for 6 weeks. I included breakfast in this situation because the husband needs more fat and meat to quell his cravings in the short run. Longer term, IF can be incorporated into the lifestyle and is very easy to do...once the cravings have dissipated. And as you state weightloss on a ketogenic diet and IF will result in weight loss but that is not the objective here. And I suspect these folks are twenty somethings and he needs 3500-4000 Kcals per day to handle his very active profession.

2
100fd85230060e754fc13394eee6d6f1

(18706)

on March 29, 2010
at 03:19 AM

I think if you make sure he gets enough fatty cuts of meat, he should be getting enough calories. If he is not showing signs of tiredness, then the calories is probably not the issue.

Sugar cravings stay alive from changing levels of insulin. The only way I know of to stop them is to lower carbs and eliminate sweet tasting foods. If you are making him lots of paleo or quasi-paleo desserts, these are probably actually feeding the cycle of cravings.

I would try foregoing the sweets, whatever their origin, to let the insulin settle down, just as you plan, and you may find his cravings take care of themselves.

Fd35eb89073e3a758066b7fcaad63d7c

(796)

on March 29, 2010
at 08:14 AM

he was very tired, before we started being more liberal with desserts, and also losing weight quickly; so I think he was not getting enough calories. I agree with you that the sugar cravings will settle down when he stops eating sweets (my sweet tooth is much more tame now that i eat paleo) the problem is getting enough calories for his highly active job, especially because he doesn't like to eat breakfast and sometimes skips lunch, too. He has nuts at work which he sometimes eats. He eats a big dinner, but is hungry again a few hours later.

100fd85230060e754fc13394eee6d6f1

(18706)

on March 29, 2010
at 03:26 PM

In that case, upping the fat is probably your best strategy, both by choosing fatty cuts, and adding fats. Save fat from cooking and use it liberally.

1
5ebeec76e20738d0a17cd724d64b1e0f

on March 30, 2010
at 09:29 PM

More fat is the answer. I've found cream to be an excellent solution. A glass of cream tastes great. Cream with a little baking cocoa isn't sweet, but is a great low-carb treat.

You can also try something like a few berries buried in whipped cream.

Also see my blog post about carb cravings:

http://www.12knowmore.com/index.php/2010/03/21/managing-carb-cravings/

1
13c5a9f1678d75b93f269cdcf69f14d5

(2339)

on March 30, 2010
at 12:18 AM

how about coconut milk or pemmican with or instead of the nuts as a snack. Or is it really a very late breakfast in his constricted "eating window"?

1
97af1caf30f029165abc783a20349c9f

(510)

on March 29, 2010
at 12:10 PM

Kill 2 birds with 1 stone: more, a lot more, huge amounts of fat = extra calories, less appetite (esp. sweets) Try heavy sauces with real cream, good butter. Everything made with/from full fat coconut stuff is very delicious and addictive. Maybe you know those blocks similar to white chocolate. They taste great, somehow sweet and are a good snack to carry with. And again my old advice for red palm oil. One can use it as pure sauce. It??s very healthy and yummy.

0
8287c6ddae0d78eae0a09fdd5999617c

(2581)

on August 30, 2010
at 11:24 AM

Insulin spike is a myth. Insulin is not your enemy, it is actually the body's ally in keeping blood sugar levels normal. Even if a rise in insulin was the terrible evil fat-gaining thing low-carb proponents make it out to be, low-carb foods show no benefit, as meat, eggs and cheese still causes a significant rise in insulin.

http://www.healthcentral.com/diabetes/c/17/1615/insulin-index

Desserts may give you bad digestion because they are low in fiber, especially processed kind of desserts. Contrast that with nature's sweet whole foods like fruits, and some sweet vegetables like carrots and sweet potatoes.

Some people will point out the fructose content in fruit but fructose is healthier, yes healthier than other sugars, and lower in calories, lower in glycemic index and glycemic load. But we have lots of misinformation going around today, people think that sucrose is healthier than fructose now. Can you imagine someone saying yes to a cookie, but no to a piece of fruit because "It has fructose", that's just silly.

0
3a966a805e09d88b0f223f2985392e4f

(836)

on August 30, 2010
at 09:58 AM

Hey Heather,

I am in Korea too. I've been on the Paleo diet for about 5 or 6 years. I'd love to chat with you guys about the diet and share some tips. However I live out in the provinces. Check my profile for my email address and give me a shout.

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