11

votes

HAPPY FESTIVUS EVERBODY! What's your paleo grievance?

Answered on August 19, 2014
Created December 23, 2011 at 6:55 PM

Happy Festivus! I'd like to take a second to celebrate and to initiate the Airing of the Grievances paleo style.

I am mad! Real mad that I've been told to eat lowfat, processed foods my whole life because it says "healthy" on the box. So I got fat! Real fat eating this way. You suck BIG FOOD! You are LIARS!

Thank gawd for paleo... it's changed my body, my mind and my life in 2011. 2012 is going to be awesome!

Merry Festivus eveyone! What's your 2011 grievance???

3aea514b680d01bfd7573d74517946a7

(11996)

on December 24, 2011
at 10:56 PM

Keep picking yourself up and dusting yourself off. Eventually you'll stop getting thrown. :)

8838443ac82e9f98e4ae9daf80d50eb5

(896)

on December 24, 2011
at 05:22 PM

How about when you give in because they look so sad... and then they stand there an watch you eat the whole thing until you swallow it. Like it's medicine or something.

C0fcb48d7da4f76fac17318efd2cd6b8

(4069)

on December 24, 2011
at 03:05 PM

How's that for grumpy?

6cdc6b1e75690cfcc4804a6c9eaa910a

(2171)

on December 24, 2011
at 10:36 AM

What gets me is the heartbroken puppy eyes I get when I refuse something...as though I have insulted them in the worst possible way rather than simply trying to avoid them killing me slowly!

306aa57660d911781231f8090c2a5619

(3808)

on December 24, 2011
at 04:45 AM

My grandfather developed interstitial lung disease as the result of statin usage. He's now on continuous oxygen, and has undoubtedly had years taken off his life, with a reduced quality of life in the meantime.

B4e1fa6a8cf43d2b69d97a99dfca262c

(10255)

on December 24, 2011
at 04:11 AM

+1 for "the devil's spit"

22212e9ba2a041e6da6c963d4d41615a

(5773)

on December 24, 2011
at 12:15 AM

No worries...I'd laugh to but I'm to busy squeezing..lol.

778b36f4f699f202de135ef176fe9ab7

(1123)

on December 24, 2011
at 12:14 AM

Yes. I have these same things happen to me all the time. One of my friends who claims I am her best can't seem to stop offering me bread and ice cream. Thanks, bestie... And I have to say about the Pringles... once you pop, you can't stop!

8838443ac82e9f98e4ae9daf80d50eb5

(896)

on December 23, 2011
at 11:57 PM

oh my! I just spat out my kombucha! I am not laughing at you, I am laughing with you. :-}

164ed7cd8d84c926bc66f366619bf853

(495)

on December 23, 2011
at 11:04 PM

I'll agree w/this statement & add to it that as a sci-med student/employee, the same crap is taught/accepted re:SAD. It's sad, frustrating, & angering.

5e6a6f5c0fd3ab048f81c0a500206f41

(956)

on December 23, 2011
at 10:31 PM

my family does that to me alllll the time too! they know im paleo, but are always like, "i bought you some granola!" "what kind of bread do you want me to get for christmas dinner?" "how much pasta do you want for dinner?" etc etc. the worst is when they send me care packages full of candy & carbs! my roommates sure do love it though!

98bf2ca7f8778c79cd3f6c962011cfdc

(24286)

on December 23, 2011
at 10:27 PM

Ah but Nance falling off the wagon is when we have the opportunity to really see, to truly learn and to have strength to finally change. Sounds like you did just that. I'd say it's been a pretty good year for you.

Be1dbd31e4a3fccd4394494aa5db256d

(17969)

on December 23, 2011
at 10:03 PM

Plus $%$#%#ing one. I'm so sorry.

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7 Answers

13
0242b468fe1c97997749db416c92e7ed

(4528)

on December 23, 2011
at 09:32 PM

My biggest grievances are against the $%&#! doctors who convinced my mother that statins were necessary to lower her already-low cholesterol in order to prevent heart disease, and my morbidly obese, diabetic father that a low-fat, high carbohydrate, insulin injection-supplemented diet would control his disease.

When Mom had a heart attack three years ago at the age of 60, her artificially-lowered total cholesterol was 142. Dad is on the verge of needing his legs amputated from diabetes-related circulation issues.

It's so difficult to watch.

Be1dbd31e4a3fccd4394494aa5db256d

(17969)

on December 23, 2011
at 10:03 PM

Plus $%$#%#ing one. I'm so sorry.

306aa57660d911781231f8090c2a5619

(3808)

on December 24, 2011
at 04:45 AM

My grandfather developed interstitial lung disease as the result of statin usage. He's now on continuous oxygen, and has undoubtedly had years taken off his life, with a reduced quality of life in the meantime.

9
22212e9ba2a041e6da6c963d4d41615a

(5773)

on December 23, 2011
at 09:48 PM

My paleo grievance is toward the restaurant that said my food contained no gluten, however, as I sit constipated on the toilet typing this grievance, it is clear to me that I was exposed to the devils spit!

8838443ac82e9f98e4ae9daf80d50eb5

(896)

on December 23, 2011
at 11:57 PM

oh my! I just spat out my kombucha! I am not laughing at you, I am laughing with you. :-}

22212e9ba2a041e6da6c963d4d41615a

(5773)

on December 24, 2011
at 12:15 AM

No worries...I'd laugh to but I'm to busy squeezing..lol.

B4e1fa6a8cf43d2b69d97a99dfca262c

(10255)

on December 24, 2011
at 04:11 AM

+1 for "the devil's spit"

7
C0fcb48d7da4f76fac17318efd2cd6b8

on December 24, 2011
at 05:24 AM

My grievance is towards my mostly plump to fat family who thinks my 115 lbs of whipcord awesomeness is a random act of genetics, and that my "food thing" is just another crazy obsession of mine. Well fat diabetic family, wake the fuck up.

C0fcb48d7da4f76fac17318efd2cd6b8

(4069)

on December 24, 2011
at 03:05 PM

How's that for grumpy?

7
6cdc6b1e75690cfcc4804a6c9eaa910a

(2171)

on December 23, 2011
at 09:21 PM

My grievance is against my family and friends who ply me with a variety of temptations and encouragements..in the wrong directions. Stuff like:
. Have some more potato Gary
. Please can you just finish this up, I don't want any left-overs
. I bought you a monster bag of Peanut M&Ms because I know you like them
. Lemon cake is your favourite, here's some lemon muffins with a lovely liquid centre
. Please join our mince pie judging competition..it only runs for 6 weeks with a different pie every day
. EDIT and this has just happened...Do you want some Pringles? [waving the tube under my nose]
etc etc

I love them all really, but please, in 2012, accept that I eat "weird" and just leave me to it...

5e6a6f5c0fd3ab048f81c0a500206f41

(956)

on December 23, 2011
at 10:31 PM

my family does that to me alllll the time too! they know im paleo, but are always like, "i bought you some granola!" "what kind of bread do you want me to get for christmas dinner?" "how much pasta do you want for dinner?" etc etc. the worst is when they send me care packages full of candy & carbs! my roommates sure do love it though!

8838443ac82e9f98e4ae9daf80d50eb5

(896)

on December 24, 2011
at 05:22 PM

How about when you give in because they look so sad... and then they stand there an watch you eat the whole thing until you swallow it. Like it's medicine or something.

778b36f4f699f202de135ef176fe9ab7

(1123)

on December 24, 2011
at 12:14 AM

Yes. I have these same things happen to me all the time. One of my friends who claims I am her best can't seem to stop offering me bread and ice cream. Thanks, bestie... And I have to say about the Pringles... once you pop, you can't stop!

6cdc6b1e75690cfcc4804a6c9eaa910a

(2171)

on December 24, 2011
at 10:36 AM

What gets me is the heartbroken puppy eyes I get when I refuse something...as though I have insulted them in the worst possible way rather than simply trying to avoid them killing me slowly!

4
96bf58d8c6bd492dc5b8ae46203fe247

(37227)

on December 23, 2011
at 07:35 PM

My 2011 grievance is that I fell off the wagon in August (4 months in at that point) because I hadn't fully internalized that wheat makes me sick and I hadn't yet discovered that drinking water kefir kills my carb cravings (and allows me to eat yogurt.)

I'm mad at myself because that was at least a 10-lb episode in stupidity--I gained 5 and then had to take them back off before continuing my overall weight loss. In case you're wondering, I gained 5 pounds because the first foods I ate on my binge didn't include wheat AND I did another binge a couple weeks later just to be really, really sure the wheat made me sick. It did.

And I guess this week counts as 2011, doesn't it? Well, my final feeble whimper was, "How about if I only eat one little piece of shortbread per day?" Answer: the first one didn't make me sick, at least not immediately, but by the 3rd day I had a powerful allergic reaction. (Visualize hand/finger pointing at me.) Slow learner.

98bf2ca7f8778c79cd3f6c962011cfdc

(24286)

on December 23, 2011
at 10:27 PM

Ah but Nance falling off the wagon is when we have the opportunity to really see, to truly learn and to have strength to finally change. Sounds like you did just that. I'd say it's been a pretty good year for you.

3
B4e1fa6a8cf43d2b69d97a99dfca262c

(10255)

on December 24, 2011
at 04:26 AM

my grievance is misleading labeling/food information. i want a farm for Festivus!

2
B33f7c04c09d8bbbf181dd8aca04f373

on December 24, 2011
at 03:08 PM

My grievance is that I have not learned/internalized all of the paleo wisdom yet. Hit another hard fall into SAD but today is a different day. I will indulge in my favorite Christmas treats, but not just the okay ones - and no grains!

3aea514b680d01bfd7573d74517946a7

(11996)

on December 24, 2011
at 10:56 PM

Keep picking yourself up and dusting yourself off. Eventually you'll stop getting thrown. :)

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