6

votes

JESUS ATE BREAD. Shouldn't humans eat it too?

Answered on September 12, 2014
Created November 30, 2012 at 6:00 AM

If humans weren't designed to eat bread (and other grains for that matter) why should Jesus be able to eat it?

F291857fa12a0291688ea994343156dc

(720)

on December 06, 2013
at 06:46 PM

Maybe he 'knew' he wasn't here for the long haul? If you're not expecting to live beyond 40, you can ingest just about anything as long as it's short of the acute toxic dose... think rock n' roll stars.

Medium avatar

(10611)

on December 06, 2013
at 03:55 AM

God loves the smell of burning meat. He's not veg.

Medium avatar

(10611)

on December 06, 2013
at 03:46 AM

+1 for noticing that he was fasting a lot instead of playing video games.

20cc903ebccaeb1e652da3a596e8dfb4

(1038)

on December 03, 2012
at 03:17 PM

@Divrgurl13: religious arguments aside: There's really no argument about whether or not Jesus existed. He was a guy. A well-documented, real, human dude. The argument is whether or not he was the son of God. In the case that he was, that would pretty much nullify any food as being detrimental to him. He'd be a pretty trash example of what to eat since he would probably be able to shovel down arsenic with no detrimental effects.

7a6529ea25b655132fe58d793f95547a

(2040)

on November 30, 2012
at 05:41 PM

I have purged the gluten demons!

Ef9f83cb4e1826261a44c173f733789e

(13635)

on November 30, 2012
at 04:56 PM

My comment is getting down-voted even though this thread wasn't serious in the first place.

61844af1187e745e09bb394cbd28cf23

(11058)

on November 30, 2012
at 04:14 PM

Ditto what James said. My favorite term of "endearment."

Cb9a270955e2c277a02c4a4b5dad10b5

(10989)

on November 30, 2012
at 04:14 PM

Grains were detrimental even to the ancient Egyptians as demonstrated by analyzing their bones.

Cb9a270955e2c277a02c4a4b5dad10b5

(10989)

on November 30, 2012
at 04:12 PM

Christianity didn't exist before civilization and civilization didn't exist before the agricultural revolution of grains. Just because a 2000 year old prophet didn't understand the detrimental effect that eating ad libum quantities of grains had on the digestive system and overall health is no reason to downvote....

E6c14efded576a0bea38a2fe2beced6a

(689)

on November 30, 2012
at 03:19 PM

Upvote just for using "asshat".

66974b2cb291799dcd661b7dec99a9e2

(11121)

on November 30, 2012
at 02:52 PM

Fell out of my chair laughing when I read this lol.

Ba99a15e6bf870b81286791617050593

(671)

on November 30, 2012
at 01:58 PM

booooo for closing. why can't we have any fun?

46c9fbd45b82453f6a2dfe614a853314

(1876)

on November 30, 2012
at 11:57 AM

Furthermore, even if Jesus (if he really existed) did eat bread, he only lived 2000 +/- years ago, which is not very long on the evolutionary scale. Therefore, even if wheat/grains had not been genetically engineered in the last hundred years or so, we still would not have evolved to process it as well as proteins and fruits/veggies.

96440612cf0fcf366bf5ad8f776fca84

(19463)

on November 30, 2012
at 11:49 AM

Ya, that's because some of us have spent quite a lot of time and energy disinfecting ourselves of these kinds of mental viruses.

1edb06ded9ccf098a4517ca4a7a34ebc

(14952)

on November 30, 2012
at 11:22 AM

If heaven is such a wonderful place, then how is getting crucified such a big, f***ing sacrifice?

B3173217a49b5b0116078775a17eb21d

(11488)

on November 30, 2012
at 09:33 AM

If you can walk on water, you can eat bread.

Ba99a15e6bf870b81286791617050593

(671)

on November 30, 2012
at 07:55 AM

upvoted for hilarity and the fact that it will probably be downvoted since paleohacks takes itself far too seriously sometimes.

0d0842381492a41b2173a04014aae810

(4875)

on November 30, 2012
at 07:13 AM

We should probably be living strictly on bread and wine. The Christians haven't been wrong about anything else.

De267f213b375efca5da07890e5efc25

(3747)

on November 30, 2012
at 06:53 AM

do we have power of resurrection too?

Cc3ce03985eac5ebcbb95fc2329f13b0

(7370)

on November 30, 2012
at 06:13 AM

Moses talked to a burning bush. Those boys was crazy back then.

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16 Answers

13
96440612cf0fcf366bf5ad8f776fca84

(19463)

on November 30, 2012
at 11:59 AM

As a follower of the flying spaghetti monster I find it offensive to eat anything made from the body of our god. Anything made from grains is obviously his noodley appendage, and bread is just another abomination in his eyes!

Consuming grains is a sacrilege punishable by GERD, IBS, autoimmune disease, celiac disease, obesity, brain fog, diabetes, and so forth. Those who commit the abominations of bread, pasta, cereals, and crap in a bag snacks, shall inherit what they deserve and shall be sacrificed at the altar of big pharma and big agra for all eternity burning in the fires of poor health!

Hear yea, his noodly appendages shall not be consumed! Such hath spoken his apostles Robb Wolf, Lauren Cordain, Art De Vany, and the rest of his minions! So shall it be for all time until homo sapien sapiens adapts their DNA over the millenia to match what the vile rodents have adapted to! Then! That shall be judgement day and the world will end. So sayeth we all (or at least some of us.)

Brothers and sisters, avoid the evil of grains less you burn in a hell of disease and ill health. Heed his noodley instructions! Fall not into the valley of evil factory farm agriculture! Do not be tempted by the donuts of failure and the bagels of obesity, or yee shall succumb to the burning hell of the Standard American Diet! Aum ha! Amen! and Trolololo!

7a6529ea25b655132fe58d793f95547a

(2040)

on November 30, 2012
at 05:41 PM

I have purged the gluten demons!

12
20cc903ebccaeb1e652da3a596e8dfb4

(1038)

on November 30, 2012
at 06:35 AM

On a side note (and assuming you're just being an asshat): The wheat of that era was not the genetically altered super-gluten-bomb that is now ubiquitous throughout the world. It likely contained significantly less gluten, and more importantly, the people eating it actually took the time to soak/ferment it in order to kill off all the other detrimental substances in it. I'd be willing to bet that it also wasn't even ground as finely as the stuff modern human is eating, and was therefor lower GI.

Cb9a270955e2c277a02c4a4b5dad10b5

(10989)

on November 30, 2012
at 04:14 PM

Grains were detrimental even to the ancient Egyptians as demonstrated by analyzing their bones.

46c9fbd45b82453f6a2dfe614a853314

(1876)

on November 30, 2012
at 11:57 AM

Furthermore, even if Jesus (if he really existed) did eat bread, he only lived 2000 +/- years ago, which is not very long on the evolutionary scale. Therefore, even if wheat/grains had not been genetically engineered in the last hundred years or so, we still would not have evolved to process it as well as proteins and fruits/veggies.

61844af1187e745e09bb394cbd28cf23

(11058)

on November 30, 2012
at 04:14 PM

Ditto what James said. My favorite term of "endearment."

E6c14efded576a0bea38a2fe2beced6a

(689)

on November 30, 2012
at 03:19 PM

Upvote just for using "asshat".

20cc903ebccaeb1e652da3a596e8dfb4

(1038)

on December 03, 2012
at 03:17 PM

@Divrgurl13: religious arguments aside: There's really no argument about whether or not Jesus existed. He was a guy. A well-documented, real, human dude. The argument is whether or not he was the son of God. In the case that he was, that would pretty much nullify any food as being detrimental to him. He'd be a pretty trash example of what to eat since he would probably be able to shovel down arsenic with no detrimental effects.

7
Ba99a15e6bf870b81286791617050593

(671)

on November 30, 2012
at 07:54 AM

Since he'd been fasting for so long in the desert, his glycogen stores were probably pretty depleted. I'd imagine his body could handle it pretty well with minimal side effects. And maybe it was really ezekiel bread:

http://www.foodforlife.com/about_us/ezekiel-49

"Take also unto thee wheat, and barley, and beans, and lentils and millet, and spelt and put them in one vessel???" Ezekiel 4:9

Halfway to gluten free! I wonder if they were getting sprouted in that vessel...

Medium avatar

(10611)

on December 06, 2013
at 03:46 AM

+1 for noticing that he was fasting a lot instead of playing video games.

6
B3173217a49b5b0116078775a17eb21d

(11488)

on November 30, 2012
at 07:24 AM

Duh. God was like obviously a low-carber, cos when Abraham offered his some bread, he only asked for a morsel(Genesis 18:5-15). Now don't get me wrong, I'm not having a dig at Jesus but, like so many young people today, it seems that he wasn't prepared to listen to parental advice. There is nothing Paleo about his promotion of fish and bread to large crowds. I suspect Monsanto were involved somewhere.

http://livinlavidalowcarb.com/blog/can-a-christian-follow-a-paleo-low-carb-diet/9381

66974b2cb291799dcd661b7dec99a9e2

(11121)

on November 30, 2012
at 02:52 PM

Fell out of my chair laughing when I read this lol.

3
Cbda678b2a6bf0537d8c4ea0ce8aa9ad

(4319)

on November 30, 2012
at 11:47 AM

On a side note: If we go farther back and speak directly to God herself. Abel brought meat and Cain vegetables, to which God said "Meat is far cooler". Cain threw a fit and whacked Abel and here we are today.

3
3089dd0b9a8f1d24f1b08d6cc3ca84e3

(363)

on November 30, 2012
at 07:24 AM

Wit the tons of contradictions that are in the bible i would never eat that way !!! The bible prescribes a USDA pyramid diet jus look it ul , its a low fat diet in the bible , God always wanted them to cut the fat and things like pork were an abomination . Believe that garbage if u want .

Medium avatar

(10611)

on December 06, 2013
at 03:55 AM

God loves the smell of burning meat. He's not veg.

2
Ef9f83cb4e1826261a44c173f733789e

on November 30, 2012
at 12:18 PM

Jesus didn't live to see 34. That's not much of an endorsement for bread.

Ef9f83cb4e1826261a44c173f733789e

(13635)

on November 30, 2012
at 04:56 PM

My comment is getting down-voted even though this thread wasn't serious in the first place.

2
Dc594d9b86218d0a54baf964fd39496c

(594)

on November 30, 2012
at 06:04 AM

I sincerely hope this is a tongue-in-cheek question

1
Cb9a270955e2c277a02c4a4b5dad10b5

(10989)

on November 30, 2012
at 12:33 PM

If Jesus nailed himself to a cross would you too? Ever notice how people in that time period weren't all that healthy? Hence Jesus going around performing miracles healing people.

Cb9a270955e2c277a02c4a4b5dad10b5

(10989)

on November 30, 2012
at 04:12 PM

Christianity didn't exist before civilization and civilization didn't exist before the agricultural revolution of grains. Just because a 2000 year old prophet didn't understand the detrimental effect that eating ad libum quantities of grains had on the digestive system and overall health is no reason to downvote....

1
Bb3d1772b28c02da2426e40dfcb533f5

(5381)

on November 30, 2012
at 10:31 AM

Bible is contradictory stuff clearly. In one part Jesus says "turn the other cheek", in another he says that his follows should carry a sword. Either thats what you get for bathing in an annonting oil full of cannabis flowers, or the romans edited the hell out of that book. And given that divinely granted forgiveness from sin, and holy communion are both ripped off from the egyptian isis cult, as is the ressurection story itself, I suspect strongly that the bible is in fact the blending of the four popular religions of the day - judiasm, isis cult, mithraism and the newer jesus following. Figuring out what jesus actually did or said, amongst all of that is a bit like trying to find the truth about robin hood, or king arthur, or using the modern version of sleeping beauty to figure out the original.

1
F6b28b8f67467af0337a0381a6857f4f

(203)

on November 30, 2012
at 07:00 AM

I notice there seems to be alot of trolls on this site.. guess thats to be expected on the interwebz

96440612cf0fcf366bf5ad8f776fca84

(19463)

on November 30, 2012
at 11:49 AM

Ya, that's because some of us have spent quite a lot of time and energy disinfecting ourselves of these kinds of mental viruses.

0
A048b66e08306d405986b6c04bf5e8e4

on December 06, 2013
at 10:33 PM

If you want to eat the kind of bread Jesus ate, it should probably be organic, heirloom, sprouted, hand-ground bread, not the chalky, super-starched, super-proteined, super-drugged bread that's making us sick today

0
Medium avatar

(10611)

on December 06, 2013
at 04:03 AM

Because he went everywhere on foot, had no home or job, and needed cheap calories to survive. Bread has always been a staple food for poor people.

0
85d8fb06cacf53b73bf094046e8c879b

on December 05, 2013
at 06:19 PM

Welness mama covered this. http://wellnessmama.com/2359/does-the-bible-say-we-should-eat-grains/

0
A7def022317fc9f4074fdd972c45fb6f

on November 30, 2012
at 01:41 PM

Wasn't their bread sprouted?

0
E253f8ac1d139bf4d0bfb44debd1db21

on November 30, 2012
at 06:46 AM

Totally different bread back then. I'd eat it also!

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