2

votes

How did you do it?

Answered on August 19, 2014
Created November 30, 2012 at 7:39 PM

I know 100% what I need to eat, what makes me feel good,w hat is healthy, how to eat for life to keep me healthy, mentally happy and good. Once of twice in my life I have managed to change how I ate ,but then I came off track so I suppose I know in the past I have been able to make a change. However for two years now I have tried and tried and seem to fail.

My question is how to people effect change? Short of finding someone to lock me up I don't see how to stop the over eating of the wrong foods. I always have a healthy breakfast so any eating during the morning is not because of hunger. I have a lovely lunch, stir fry, lots of olive oil, masses and masses of veg, fish etc. Then it virtually always goes off the fails, trip out in the car to buy today hot chocolate drink, 3 little chocolate things, 2 big chocolate coins and a slice of chocolate cake, so not very hungry later. Just had bananas and now might as well stuff myself with some baked potato as I've failed yet again. At least I had no diet coke today which seems virtually to poison me. For the first time in a week because I had the chocolate and the milky drink my nose is running and I feel high and of course happy too.

What I want to find is the key to making change. If I stay off sugar/chocolate for long enough then I can get out of the habit of wanting it. However even then I will over eat on pecan nuts, raisins etc. I don't eat normal portions of raisins. I eat huge amounts. I don't have an off switch for fruit and dried fruit (and of course chocolate). However if I gave it up I would be back on the chocolate.

How can I want so much to lose the 30 pounds I put on and yet be unable even for one day to cut out what I shouldn't eat? I am now the fattest person in the family.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on April 21, 2013
at 10:06 AM

Interesting. I am the same. I can easily overdo sweet potatoes. I am the person who will eat 3x the amount of bluberries as anyone else and I am doing exactly as suggested above now - not buying fruit for the week but only if I really need to driving out to buy it.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on March 13, 2013
at 08:49 PM

Seems to be habit and/or when I am very happy and/or sad. Just like feeling very very full.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on March 13, 2013
at 08:48 PM

Not at all. I feel too fat to move. I don't look and feel like me because of the weight I put on. I keeping saying when I lose 14 pounds I will start some exercise.

86c97b2779feab3c330f5e1c5fea7e25

(2312)

on February 22, 2013
at 04:02 PM

Thanks @greymouser. I'm curious as to why @Soccertanker things this is "terrible advice"

90bcfafd2ef73fea5398c483c593349e

(872)

on February 22, 2013
at 12:06 AM

Along with the suggestions posed by Shari Bambino above, try reading the book "The End of Overeating" by David Kessler. He goes into great detail describing how our brain's reward center trains us to go for our scheduled sugar hit. You describe it as a happiness hit, and reading the book will help you understand why you chose that particular word. Link: http://www.amazon.com/The-End-Overeating-Insatiable-American/dp/B004NSVE32

90bcfafd2ef73fea5398c483c593349e

(872)

on February 22, 2013
at 12:01 AM

Shari, if I could upvote you 1000 times for this reply, I would. Very well said.

Ebb10603524dd22621c1155dd7ddf106

(19150)

on February 21, 2013
at 09:09 PM

@Soccertanker "Get exercise" is just about the best advice I've heard on this thread yet, even if @Desmond brought up the spectre of "you gotta have self control."

949d4d02ea7d1abd714cc3347c2c6854

(1021)

on February 21, 2013
at 08:53 PM

Shari, thanks so much for this. If I could give you ten points for this one, I would. I think this is one of the most helpful answers I've read on PH. You sound just like me, and this is exactly my problem. I need to rewrite my scripts. I'm going to print this out so I can read it a few more times. Can I ask, did you look for a cognitive behavioral therapist with experience in eating disorders? How did you find someone? My previous therapy experiences have been less than helpful, and I would like to do better.

949d4d02ea7d1abd714cc3347c2c6854

(1021)

on February 21, 2013
at 08:47 PM

I've tried this several times now. I'll be strict quite a while, feel great, and then decide to have a cheat day. Inevitably, I go off the rails. Then I try telling myself not to count calories on the Paleo stuff, just eat as much as I want until I'm back "on track". Unfortunately, I'm learning that it doesn't work for me. I stuff myself on nuts and dried fruits, and then I delay my return to "normal" longer and longer, because I don't want to limit myself. I'm still trying to figure out something that works.

32652cb696b75182cb121009ee4edea3

(5802)

on February 21, 2013
at 08:27 PM

I will second this. You have to stop saying, "I can't eat THAT," but rather, "I CAN eat this!". If you need something chocolatey and paleo, here is one good recipe: http://www.paleoplan.com/2009/12-03/paleo-candybars/. For me, I had to go through several cycles of eating clean and backsliding before I realized that I HATED the way I felt when I ate bad. Feeling good finally became worth it. But it was a long road.

0382fa263de4c83328dc34a56e25437f

(4238)

on February 21, 2013
at 07:07 PM

+1 -- both black coffee and 100% dark chocolate are awesome ways to round off a meal.

0382fa263de4c83328dc34a56e25437f

(4238)

on February 21, 2013
at 07:04 PM

For me, the sugar issue is still an issue even after five years of paleo eating. The only thing that works for me is cold turkey -- nothing with sugar, not even fruit.

F4a6fc9f0b701e12cdf2ad5dadaeb2dd

(360)

on February 21, 2013
at 06:42 PM

This is terrible advice imo.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 16, 2012
at 10:02 PM

More a sugar addict. I did manage yesterday for the first time in about two years only to eat as I want to eat. I felt terribly pleased as if now I realise it is possible until we had a family lunch for 10 today and my sister brought me expensive truffles even though she knows my issues (just like handing cocaine or a bottle of vodka to an addict) and I ate those and then lots of other stuff after but I think as I could manage one day yesterday I could again. It helped to take chromium picolinate and also some gultamine in water and I think that might have been what stopped the sugar urge.

Fd70d71f4f8195c3a098eda4fc817d4f

(8014)

on December 12, 2012
at 10:10 PM

Really nice answer, Shari. Good to see a dose of plain, simple, *humanity* injected here.

98bf2ca7f8778c79cd3f6c962011cfdc

(24286)

on December 09, 2012
at 01:34 AM

It really is a journey.So cliche but so true.When you are willing to give up the raisins I would try that. That is a massive amount of sugar. If you can find a way to stick with nuts I think that would help your resolve. I still have moment when I "break" but I get in the car and drive to the cheese shop and buy a pound of my favorite cheese. Or a rib eye. Or some good beef jerky. I have a list of special foods that I only buy in emergency situations when I'm about to go off the rails. You can still get in your car and buy food but buy different food. Try it. It really works.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 08, 2012
at 06:54 PM

It's the issue of will over addiction, isn't it? Most alcoholics and drug addicts would like to be free of the addiction. I think if you have no addictions it is hard to explain. One of my children just decided to lose weight so he just eats less, total absolute control, thinks anyone must be an idiot if they cannot just take a decision to put less in their mouth, thinks how can anyone not be able to control their own arm? I can see his point but unless you live with an addiction it is hard to explain it. It just seems weak.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 08, 2012
at 06:52 PM

Shari,that's very helpful. Thank you. That is also consistent with what I believe - that some foods, sugar, chocolate etc remove the willpower. It is a vicious circle as you cannot make the change until you change how you eat but as long as you're eating badly you can't make the change. So I think if I come off the worst of the foods, the processed foods which I'm trying from this afternoon (again) that is a better start for me, eat as much as I like of fods which make me feel good. I ate 1250 cals of nuts and raisins. Better than chocolate for me but still...

5457372e78a910c00cd1dd579ecbdce3

(1230)

on December 03, 2012
at 03:29 AM

Don't feel that you have to cut all of the junk out at once though. A little here and there until you have it. That is how I quit smoking, how I quit sugar and how I quit grain. Reduce when you can, don't beat yourself up when you can't.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 02, 2012
at 01:51 PM

I certainly agree people can change thought and I wake up most days thinking I am lucky to be here. Most my family are psychiatrists and I am sure a lot of those help people alter their thoughts to positive ones. Applying that to addictions is harder. I just read an interview with an addict (Pete Doherty). Everything described is similar but at a worse level to that which sugar addicts have yet sugar addicts are some huge joke not taken seriously, yet when I am in the grip of it I will drive out to find somewhere to buy that hit of sugar, even though the house is virtually sugar free.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 02, 2012
at 01:49 PM

Exactly who I've managed it before. Perhaps that is what I need to do first this time, cut out the junk, replace with the 1000 calories of pecan nuts and raisins or whatever and only when "off" the processed food, then try to cut back so I start to lose the 30 pounds.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 02, 2012
at 01:47 PM

I'm virtually never hungry and always eat the bad stuff when I'm not hungry (except when I've managed to come off sugar which was a wonderful time as I stopped thinking about when the next hit of sugar or diet coke was coming from). As I've managed before I can manage again although I'm sitting here planning a trip out for a swim and the pleasure I'm thinking of is that after I will buy 2 diet coke cans and 50g of 70% chocolate. I won't be hungry.It will give me a kick/high. The good foods I eat, the proteins, veg fat mean I am virtually never ill. It is not all bad.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 02, 2012
at 01:45 PM

I know. My sister is terrible like that - never ever accepts a solution.In fact the brain chemistry people would say until you get to three good meals a day you should not even try to give up the after meal junk as it's not your fault you continue to want it. I do think some people are addicted to sugar and people laugh at them in a way they never would if it were alcohol but it's the same compulsion, not just will power, an illness really.

D41bd7b3d3b962eb0146f471eb632f56

(2029)

on December 01, 2012
at 08:19 PM

The diabeetus is a merciless mistress.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 01, 2012
at 06:04 PM

Sorry if that seems rude. I don't mean it to be. It just seems like a lot of folks bring up their problems, actively seeking solutions, then proceed to explain why any & every idea won't work for them. Just try the next idea. If it doesn't work, try the next one. Making excuses for why it won't work DEFINITELY gets nothing done.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 01, 2012
at 05:48 PM

Telling a child they are unique and special is great for their self-esteem. Applying that to adults, trying to problem-solve, is complete horse puckey. Your problems are human problems, shared by millions. Follow the paths of the ones with solutions.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 01, 2012
at 05:43 PM

I know. I was overweight. Try the book.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 01, 2012
at 05:27 PM

Most people who are overweight know what they need to eat but they cannot stop that compulsion to eat and eat for comfort or to mask a feeling of sadness.I certainly agree that those recommendations are right. It is the constant need to reward myself with a hit of sugar or carb which is such a hard habit to break.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 01, 2012
at 05:25 PM

That is the difficult thing . For addicts of alcohol, drugs, sugar a bit of your brain almost shouts at you to get in the car and drive to buy the addictive substance. Now some programmes like on radiantrecovery.com suggest first get your three good meals a day, keep the treats but have them after the meal and think that's fairly wise. Sometimes I've also tried moving off the addictive substances and replacing with say 1000 calories of pecan nuts and raisins or 10 bananas well as breakfast and lunch so I'm not hungry so not eating chocolate by the ton but getting out of that chocolate habit.

956bcad1d462d433a4e1e22f6e3355d5

(1191)

on November 30, 2012
at 09:33 PM

Are you maybe an emotional eater?

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on November 30, 2012
at 09:17 PM

Thank you. That is the issue. I suspect once the diet is balanced the self control is fine (it has been in the past). So it's moving from this point of chocolate/sugar addiction to being back on track which is so hard. Moving to a point where I am not sitting here unable to concentrate on work because the brain chemicals are shouting out to me - get sugar, get it and stopping me concentrate until I have the hit of my addictive substance. Exercise is good too. Until this week I have never had a date when someone said they liked my curves (i.e. I'm fat) so that was pretty bad.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on November 30, 2012
at 09:14 PM

I'll try the book. Thank you. In fact that is really how I managed it last time - not worrying about weight, just changing to only eating good food and then it fell into place. I thought for a few years I would never get back to her again but I failed.

Frontpage book

Get FREE instant access to our Paleo For Beginners Guide & 15 FREE Recipes!

19 Answers

8
B3173217a49b5b0116078775a17eb21d

(11488)

on December 01, 2012
at 04:04 PM

I caught the diabetes, and worked out that if I didn't do something radical, they'd end up cutting off my toes, and my eyeballs would start bleeding. After that, it was kinda simple.

D41bd7b3d3b962eb0146f471eb632f56

(2029)

on December 01, 2012
at 08:19 PM

The diabeetus is a merciless mistress.

6
Ef777978cfeb8fbdd18d75c4f6c4cb23

on December 01, 2012
at 03:04 PM

People, women in particular, if I may be so bold, have become experts in giving stuff up. If I stop eating this, I will stop being that.

What they are not expert in is replacing it with something. If I stop eating grains, what am I going to eat instead? Is it potatoes or is it low fat cottage cheese?

If I may respectfully suggest: if fish & veg is not doing it for you, you need to up the energy dense food. Try steak, try lamb, try pork, try double (heavy cream), try something that gives you energy. When you have stopped the cravings, then you can dial back on stuff, if you need to.

What if the chocolate cravings are not sugar-driven, but fat/energy driven?

Personally I need to eat something substantial between lunch and dinner. I generally eat around midday and 7.30pm. It's too long to go with out food. Around 4pm I'll eat a pack of parma ham. I know it's not just me. Lots of my clients get the munchies late afternoon.

32652cb696b75182cb121009ee4edea3

(5802)

on February 21, 2013
at 08:27 PM

I will second this. You have to stop saying, "I can't eat THAT," but rather, "I CAN eat this!". If you need something chocolatey and paleo, here is one good recipe: http://www.paleoplan.com/2009/12-03/paleo-candybars/. For me, I had to go through several cycles of eating clean and backsliding before I realized that I HATED the way I felt when I ate bad. Feeling good finally became worth it. But it was a long road.

5
86c97b2779feab3c330f5e1c5fea7e25

(2312)

on November 30, 2012
at 08:17 PM

At a certain point, you just have to have self control. I know this might not be the most helpful answer but I believe it is simple and true.

I would say to try and limit what you get..yes treat yourself when you want, but use that self control to stop at a certain point. Go have a piece of cake, but don't consider that as "You have failed" and continue to binge.

Not sure if you exercise but...EXERCISE! Not only will this help with becoming healthy, it will make you think twice about eating all of this bad food. Once you spend 45 minutes busting your butt in the gym, you don't want to flush all that hard work down the toilet.

Once you have learned to control your cravings and eating, then there a multitude of different diets to try out!

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on November 30, 2012
at 09:17 PM

Thank you. That is the issue. I suspect once the diet is balanced the self control is fine (it has been in the past). So it's moving from this point of chocolate/sugar addiction to being back on track which is so hard. Moving to a point where I am not sitting here unable to concentrate on work because the brain chemicals are shouting out to me - get sugar, get it and stopping me concentrate until I have the hit of my addictive substance. Exercise is good too. Until this week I have never had a date when someone said they liked my curves (i.e. I'm fat) so that was pretty bad.

Ebb10603524dd22621c1155dd7ddf106

(19150)

on February 21, 2013
at 09:09 PM

@Soccertanker "Get exercise" is just about the best advice I've heard on this thread yet, even if @Desmond brought up the spectre of "you gotta have self control."

86c97b2779feab3c330f5e1c5fea7e25

(2312)

on February 22, 2013
at 04:02 PM

Thanks @greymouser. I'm curious as to why @Soccertanker things this is "terrible advice"

F4a6fc9f0b701e12cdf2ad5dadaeb2dd

(360)

on February 21, 2013
at 06:42 PM

This is terrible advice imo.

4
98bf2ca7f8778c79cd3f6c962011cfdc

on December 03, 2012
at 04:54 PM

You are singing my song. I did this very same thing for years and years and years. I lost 100 lbs several times. Thought I had really changed. Ha!

I tried the "you just have to want it bad enough", intuitive eating, "self-control", eating more fat, and all that other stuff. Nope. Nothing worked for me. This last time, I decided to change the way I thought. My favorite weight loss mantra was and still is "It's only a thought and a thought can be changed". Like you I had very strong scripts that ran in my brain that, when triggered, lead me to the death spiral you are experiencing. My answer was to take the time to look at those scripts, the little voice in my head that was telling me to go get some xyz" and learn to recognize it, to challenge it, and to ultimately re-write it. It requires brutal honesty with ones self, attention, patience, and practice.

For me it went something like this. I've just consumed all sorts of chocolaty things (to use your example) and the act is over. Sitting there with myself in horror and disgust I would take out paper and pen and think back to what had gone on inside of my head and write it down. I would write out the conversation. Sometimes it came right to me. Sometimes it took days to unravel it. I needed to identify the conversation I had had with myself that made eating that chocolate seem like a good idea. What was going on? How did it start? For me I found that years and years of dieting had written some scripts which were total disaster and lead to this kind of self-destructive behavior. I also found that stress was a huge factor. Once I understood the scripts I could recognize them and once I was able to recognize them I learned how to stop them and ultimately, in most cases, I learned to re-write them so they no longer played in my head. Cognitive behavioral therapy is a very powerful thing.

I need to also mention that, FOR ME, lowering my carb intake was helpful beyond measure in giving me the ability to do this. I believe strongly that my behavioral issues were very much linked to my carbohydrate intake. Significant carb intake takes away my ability to reason with myself. Low carb gives me sanity.

Please know that you are not alone. There is nothing wrong with you. This is precisely the issue that plagues so many people. If you think throngs of people are out there slaying their demons by "going paleo" you are wrong. For as many people who start to eat in a healthy manner and seem to just "do it" there are a thousand or more who tried and didn't. Most people fail at this paleo or not.

In your case, having been able to at least appear successful in your endeavor then landing face first in a bag of chocolate donuts, it would seem that you have been "white-knuckling" it and not really getting to the core of the issue(s). Again, I did the same thing. You can hold on by sheer willpower for only so long. You need to figure this out for yourself. Figure out what is going on inside of your head then change it. It's a brain transplant of sorts. "It's only a thought and a thought can be changed." Remember that. Each and every time. Identify the ones that don't serve you and give yourself new thoughts that do.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 08, 2012
at 06:52 PM

Shari,that's very helpful. Thank you. That is also consistent with what I believe - that some foods, sugar, chocolate etc remove the willpower. It is a vicious circle as you cannot make the change until you change how you eat but as long as you're eating badly you can't make the change. So I think if I come off the worst of the foods, the processed foods which I'm trying from this afternoon (again) that is a better start for me, eat as much as I like of fods which make me feel good. I ate 1250 cals of nuts and raisins. Better than chocolate for me but still...

98bf2ca7f8778c79cd3f6c962011cfdc

(24286)

on December 09, 2012
at 01:34 AM

It really is a journey.So cliche but so true.When you are willing to give up the raisins I would try that. That is a massive amount of sugar. If you can find a way to stick with nuts I think that would help your resolve. I still have moment when I "break" but I get in the car and drive to the cheese shop and buy a pound of my favorite cheese. Or a rib eye. Or some good beef jerky. I have a list of special foods that I only buy in emergency situations when I'm about to go off the rails. You can still get in your car and buy food but buy different food. Try it. It really works.

Fd70d71f4f8195c3a098eda4fc817d4f

(8014)

on December 12, 2012
at 10:10 PM

Really nice answer, Shari. Good to see a dose of plain, simple, *humanity* injected here.

949d4d02ea7d1abd714cc3347c2c6854

(1021)

on February 21, 2013
at 08:53 PM

Shari, thanks so much for this. If I could give you ten points for this one, I would. I think this is one of the most helpful answers I've read on PH. You sound just like me, and this is exactly my problem. I need to rewrite my scripts. I'm going to print this out so I can read it a few more times. Can I ask, did you look for a cognitive behavioral therapist with experience in eating disorders? How did you find someone? My previous therapy experiences have been less than helpful, and I would like to do better.

90bcfafd2ef73fea5398c483c593349e

(872)

on February 22, 2013
at 12:01 AM

Shari, if I could upvote you 1000 times for this reply, I would. Very well said.

3
5457372e78a910c00cd1dd579ecbdce3

(1230)

on December 01, 2012
at 08:53 PM

Health is a direction, not a destination. Making small changes here and there will add up quickly.

I mostly quit refined sugar (that was my biggest challenge) by steps. One day I didn't eat a chocolate bar after lunch. I replaced it with dates or something else that is sweet but still Paleo. I didn't even care how much I ate, because I felt it was better to go overboard with something natural and healthy than to keep stuffing crap in my face. I made these replacements a little at a time and now am pretty much on track.

Another tip is not to try making direct replacements. Don't swap chocolate cake for some kind of Paleo chocolate cake, as they rarely taste as good. Just eat something that tastes good and satisfies your need for sweet or sour or salty or whatever it was. You can do the substitution thing when your palate is no longer insensitive to hyper-palatable food, because "Paleo chocolate cake" will actually start to taste good.

Then there is the whole "Candy cigarette" argument, but I will leave that to better people than I.

5457372e78a910c00cd1dd579ecbdce3

(1230)

on December 03, 2012
at 03:29 AM

Don't feel that you have to cut all of the junk out at once though. A little here and there until you have it. That is how I quit smoking, how I quit sugar and how I quit grain. Reduce when you can, don't beat yourself up when you can't.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 02, 2012
at 01:49 PM

Exactly who I've managed it before. Perhaps that is what I need to do first this time, cut out the junk, replace with the 1000 calories of pecan nuts and raisins or whatever and only when "off" the processed food, then try to cut back so I start to lose the 30 pounds.

949d4d02ea7d1abd714cc3347c2c6854

(1021)

on February 21, 2013
at 08:47 PM

I've tried this several times now. I'll be strict quite a while, feel great, and then decide to have a cheat day. Inevitably, I go off the rails. Then I try telling myself not to count calories on the Paleo stuff, just eat as much as I want until I'm back "on track". Unfortunately, I'm learning that it doesn't work for me. I stuff myself on nuts and dried fruits, and then I delay my return to "normal" longer and longer, because I don't want to limit myself. I'm still trying to figure out something that works.

3
0f848e77aef9f2339762289e1c5016ea

on November 30, 2012
at 07:59 PM

i recommend the technique in the book "When Women Stop Hating Their Bodies." basically you ALLOW yourself to eat anything you want (and i mean ANYTHING), but you pay attention to eating until you are no longer physically hungry. you learn to be mindful of your actual hunger, and what you really want. most importantly, you have to forgive yourself if you overeat, love the body you have NOW. these steps help you to stop being overly focused on food. you may gain a little weight, you may lose a little weight, eventually you will learn to pay attention to your hunger cues and not eat for other reasons. you have to REALLY give yourself freedom in this though. it is NOT a diet, it can't be done with the goal of losing weight. it's a technique to help you learn to change your eating habits and also to celebrate the body you are in RIGHT NOW. i sound like a salesperson, but this book changed my life. i ordered a used copy on amazon.com for less than $10. i hope this helps. the relief i feel in my life since i went through this process has been wonderful.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on November 30, 2012
at 09:14 PM

I'll try the book. Thank you. In fact that is really how I managed it last time - not worrying about weight, just changing to only eating good food and then it fell into place. I thought for a few years I would never get back to her again but I failed.

2
Cc3ce03985eac5ebcbb95fc2329f13b0

on December 01, 2012
at 08:13 PM

First, I think you have to stop seeing this as something you fail at. This kind of change, like anything you do that's worth doing, takes practice. You start out not so good, wobbly, perhaps afraid that others will see you and snicker, but you go out each day and do what you can. When you fall, just get up and try again, and instead of focus on the failures, just focus on the good things you get done. Ate a good breakfast? Score. Ate a good lunch? Score. Why let the chocolate cake be a bgger thing then those two successes?

Find some ways other than food to reward yourself. We may start out making a change because we feel bad, but we only keep going if we allow ourselves to feel good about our successes. Everyone has moments of self doubt and criticism, you need to learn to over-ride those.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 02, 2012
at 01:51 PM

I certainly agree people can change thought and I wake up most days thinking I am lucky to be here. Most my family are psychiatrists and I am sure a lot of those help people alter their thoughts to positive ones. Applying that to addictions is harder. I just read an interview with an addict (Pete Doherty). Everything described is similar but at a worse level to that which sugar addicts have yet sugar addicts are some huge joke not taken seriously, yet when I am in the grip of it I will drive out to find somewhere to buy that hit of sugar, even though the house is virtually sugar free.

1
Bfd70bb38267fcc2d762063d691fa226

(723)

on February 05, 2013
at 02:22 AM

Personally, I found that drinking black coffee at the end of my meals helps with cravings. If intense cravings are the issue, give it a try! It "hits the spot" in a much better way than would dessert.

You also might want to try 100% unsweetened dark baking chocolate. Trust me, you won't be able to overeat it! It is bitter and will quickly satisfy your chocolate cravings.

Another note, if it fits into your schedule, work out in the evening a few hours after dinner. I find that when I do this, I am less likely to indulge or overeat because I know how gross I will feel working out on a stomach full of crappy food or sugar.

0382fa263de4c83328dc34a56e25437f

(4238)

on February 21, 2013
at 07:07 PM

+1 -- both black coffee and 100% dark chocolate are awesome ways to round off a meal.

0
6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

on March 13, 2013
at 08:52 PM

Since I started this I have moved back to eating only good foods so that's a huge improvement (and about 3 years ago that is how I ate and it made me feel better). All the chocolate has gone, trips to the cafe which sells the hot chocolate, chocolates etc.

Have replaced it with nuts and raisins after meals though, 600 calories a bag and some days 3 bags of them which is not good. I tried bananas today (6) but still had 150g of raisins. You would have thought now I eat 100% natural foods and protein and fat 3 times a day the urge for the fruit and raisins would disappear but it doesn't, even if I'm eating more than enough food without it.

It seems to come back to will power. I should probably try to get some exercise and may be give up all fruit and dried fruit. I certainly cannot carry on being this overweight. I feel unlike me any more.

0
77bd13eaf75914d87d8e58f46b2262c2

on February 21, 2013
at 09:06 PM

Everyone here has some great suggestions - up your fat/protein intake, drink coffee, etc. - none of which are chocolate, but still help to get your mind off it. I have an addictive personality also, and I could easily down a bottle of wine with a piece (or two) of chocolate cake every single night. But then I took a good hard look at myself and realized that the only person who could help me was myself. So now I put naturally flavored sparkling water in a wine glass and eat a few blueberries (1 cup or less) and/or 100% dark chocolate when the cravings hit. My addictions are brought on by stress, so I have also made changes in my life to reduce that stress. What causes your cravings? Is it when you're feeling bad about yourself? You owe it to yourself to answer those hard questions that you're avoiding because the easy response is to cover it up with food, but in the end it will make the situation worse. You may want to consider professional help for addiction. No-one on here is going to give you the magic cure - because there isn't one. I wish there was a nicer way to put it, but the reality is that if you want to reach your goals, you need to get yourself together and overcome your cravings.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on March 13, 2013
at 08:49 PM

Seems to be habit and/or when I am very happy and/or sad. Just like feeling very very full.

0
B9887647a925681856c074b317188d87

on February 21, 2013
at 06:38 PM

The one thing I told myself was that these foods (chips, fries, candy, etc.) that I loved will always be there. Heck, it will guarantee outlive me for so many more years than I can imagine. I've found plenty of free paleo recipes online that have also served as a nice replacement for the things I once craved.

Once you get over that hump, your body will start to find ways to work without it, and you'll feel so much better. Just keep pushing through and know that good changes are happening.. even though it may seem like an eternity!

Another thing that I've done is trying to replace cravings by drinking more water and with a walk around the block. At least then, you are also adding some physical activity to your day, even if it's not much.

Baby steps. Good luck!

0
6dc767a3b94cb0133601caf6c39ea218

(330)

on February 21, 2013
at 06:27 PM

Are you exercising? the reason i ask is because i, too, get those "craving voices" that won't stop until i have satisfied them, usually in mass quantities. however, now that i am working out consistantly, the cravings are much less frequent and severe. it's not even a mental thing anymore (like "i don't want to undo all my hard work by eating crap"), but physically i don't even crave junk anymore. i used to eat a couple mini candybars everyday after lunch and after dinner, and eat total crap on weekends cuz i "deserved it" after a long work week. now because of working out and eating better, my body doesn't even crave junk! and if i do, it's not as severe so i am able to better control it. i think that exercise is a huge part of it too, especially when you start seeing results!

also, if you really research, you can find a healthy substitute for everything. when i crave sweets, i make chocolate cake in a mug, banana "ice cream" (which is just pureed frozen bananas that comes out all creamy like ice cream), zucchini or sweet potato chips for a salty craving....trick is just not to overeat the healthy stuff. just make enough to be a serving and hopefully that will satisfy you. and keep the bad stuff out of your house! if i buy a bag of chips, i will eat that whole bag in one day!!

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on March 13, 2013
at 08:48 PM

Not at all. I feel too fat to move. I don't look and feel like me because of the weight I put on. I keeping saying when I lose 14 pounds I will start some exercise.

0
7bf306ada57db47547e9da39a415edf6

(11214)

on February 21, 2013
at 06:00 PM

When I was trying to lose weight, my main response to such cravings was to eat something with fat/protein instead of whatever it was I was craving. I was also doing The Shangri-La diet (more of a technique than a diet, and that seems to help dampen cravings considerably. But even now, after losing 100+lbs, sweets and carbs are easy to binge on. I don't bring very much into the house. I am hoping to gain muscle, so I am playing with adding in a little more, and I feel that uneasy feeling now all the time (though I can't seem to gain)of playing with fire.

The only carb source that I can seem to buy and meter out in appropriate servings is canned pumpkin. I can overdo sweet potatoes easily. I will eat ALL blueberries near me, and the same is true of pretty much any fruit. Blackberries seem a little less dangerous, but they still go pretty fast. So, if I buy fruit, I try to buy just one serving.

The positive point here is- I did it. I lost the weight anyway. I would get something sweet about once a week, and once I managed to get off Splenda, I could enjoy the 70% and up chocolate bars. I also drank wine.

So stop thinking that you've screwed up and that you might as well screw up royally. Instead, read the labels on chocolate bars and find the ones with no grains, legumes, or milk proteins. Cheat with fruit, medjool dates, and if you can handle coconut products go get some of that ice cream that is made with coconut milk. Obviously it is best if there are long periods of time between cheats, but by reading labels and staying away from the evil three, I could have something practically every week and still lose weight. Indeed, I feel more silly about those times I did give up my little treats and wine because I now think my obsession with losing weight so fast was more foolish and potentially damaging than the cheats.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on April 21, 2013
at 10:06 AM

Interesting. I am the same. I can easily overdo sweet potatoes. I am the person who will eat 3x the amount of bluberries as anyone else and I am doing exactly as suggested above now - not buying fruit for the week but only if I really need to driving out to buy it.

0
6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

on February 21, 2013
at 04:27 PM

Very helpful answers above. I should look on the positive side. In the last two weeks I have given up entirely the chocolate, the afternoon trip to the coffee shop to buy hot chocolate and 5 or 6 chocolate items. I am back to eating clean as it were and feel so very much better. Also the sugar cravings for chocolate have gone.

That leaves the nuts and raisins (600 calories a bag), 2 bags some afternoons. I never eat them when I'm hungry. I eat them after lunch for a pleasure hit as it were or because I'm feeling happy later on and had dinner and watching a good programme on the computer.

Not surprisingly with all those calories I am not losing any weight and dare not go near the scales, but I still feel much better for giving up all the junk, chocolate, boxes of chocolates. One of the children cooked a chocolate cake last night and I have not had or really wanted any of it at all.

I cannot however stay this weight. It feels awful. Then raisins with the nuts are probably better than pack just of dried fruit and I have laid off fruit. May be I should swap that and have an orange or two rather than the nuts and raisins. If I go back on fruit though then I over eat it, 8 bananas a time gain when I'm not hungry.

90bcfafd2ef73fea5398c483c593349e

(872)

on February 22, 2013
at 12:06 AM

Along with the suggestions posed by Shari Bambino above, try reading the book "The End of Overeating" by David Kessler. He goes into great detail describing how our brain's reward center trains us to go for our scheduled sugar hit. You describe it as a happiness hit, and reading the book will help you understand why you chose that particular word. Link: http://www.amazon.com/The-End-Overeating-Insatiable-American/dp/B004NSVE32

0
6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

on December 03, 2012
at 03:15 PM

This is an example, had a very good lunch, not hungry. Little hammers going off in my head about having to drive out to buy hot chocolate with chocolate cake. Very hard to resist so had enormous bowl of raisins (basically sugar) and such a sugar hit after lunch I feel hot from it but that hasn't worked. I still have the craving for chocolate. Had no diet coke today. Cannot decide whether to give into the urge or not at the moment.

0
1963db946ae415764d9044222fbf4c5b

on December 01, 2012
at 06:26 PM

How much protein do you eat? Try eating more! As David says maybe you need to eat more nutritious food, like protein and fat. Jaminet thinks that a lot of hunger is related to deficiencies in the diet - try and make sure you're getting all the nutrients you need.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 02, 2012
at 01:47 PM

I'm virtually never hungry and always eat the bad stuff when I'm not hungry (except when I've managed to come off sugar which was a wonderful time as I stopped thinking about when the next hit of sugar or diet coke was coming from). As I've managed before I can manage again although I'm sitting here planning a trip out for a swim and the pleasure I'm thinking of is that after I will buy 2 diet coke cans and 50g of 70% chocolate. I won't be hungry.It will give me a kick/high. The good foods I eat, the proteins, veg fat mean I am virtually never ill. It is not all bad.

0
11b687f63fe5b1b611929da80ca9c724

(10)

on December 01, 2012
at 03:57 PM

I am working on a book about habit change and willpower.

The first step is awareness.

Cue --> habit -->reward

—Tova ketoproject.com

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 01, 2012
at 05:25 PM

That is the difficult thing . For addicts of alcohol, drugs, sugar a bit of your brain almost shouts at you to get in the car and drive to buy the addictive substance. Now some programmes like on radiantrecovery.com suggest first get your three good meals a day, keep the treats but have them after the meal and think that's fairly wise. Sometimes I've also tried moving off the addictive substances and replacing with say 1000 calories of pecan nuts and raisins or 10 bananas well as breakfast and lunch so I'm not hungry so not eating chocolate by the ton but getting out of that chocolate habit.

0
Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

on December 01, 2012
at 03:30 PM

What has helped me was to find the most specific programs possible.

The defining moment for me was the 4-Hour Body. The beginning chapter focuses on motivation, and it honestly is the 'active ingredients' of the entire approach for me.

Other than that, the Slow Carb Diet is fool-proof. It's filling, and you will see results in a matter of days that will continue throughout. Add to that the carb-loading 'cheat' days... I can't emphasize enough that this book is the absolute perfect introduction to healthy living and breaking the SAD lifestyle.

Half a year later I've 'graduated' to bulletproof Paleo with a few personal tweaks. No sweat at all.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 01, 2012
at 06:04 PM

Sorry if that seems rude. I don't mean it to be. It just seems like a lot of folks bring up their problems, actively seeking solutions, then proceed to explain why any & every idea won't work for them. Just try the next idea. If it doesn't work, try the next one. Making excuses for why it won't work DEFINITELY gets nothing done.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 01, 2012
at 05:43 PM

I know. I was overweight. Try the book.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 01, 2012
at 05:48 PM

Telling a child they are unique and special is great for their self-esteem. Applying that to adults, trying to problem-solve, is complete horse puckey. Your problems are human problems, shared by millions. Follow the paths of the ones with solutions.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 01, 2012
at 05:27 PM

Most people who are overweight know what they need to eat but they cannot stop that compulsion to eat and eat for comfort or to mask a feeling of sadness.I certainly agree that those recommendations are right. It is the constant need to reward myself with a hit of sugar or carb which is such a hard habit to break.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 02, 2012
at 01:45 PM

I know. My sister is terrible like that - never ever accepts a solution.In fact the brain chemistry people would say until you get to three good meals a day you should not even try to give up the after meal junk as it's not your fault you continue to want it. I do think some people are addicted to sugar and people laugh at them in a way they never would if it were alcohol but it's the same compulsion, not just will power, an illness really.

-3
E6c14efded576a0bea38a2fe2beced6a

on December 03, 2012
at 04:19 PM

"How can I want so much to lose the 30 pounds I put on and yet be unable even for one day to cut out what I shouldn't eat?"

I guess you don't want it as much as you claim to.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 08, 2012
at 06:54 PM

It's the issue of will over addiction, isn't it? Most alcoholics and drug addicts would like to be free of the addiction. I think if you have no addictions it is hard to explain. One of my children just decided to lose weight so he just eats less, total absolute control, thinks anyone must be an idiot if they cannot just take a decision to put less in their mouth, thinks how can anyone not be able to control their own arm? I can see his point but unless you live with an addiction it is hard to explain it. It just seems weak.

Answer Question


Get FREE instant access to our
Paleo For Beginners Guide & 15 FREE Recipes!