2

votes

Hack my boyfriend's libido

Answered on August 19, 2014
Created March 13, 2012 at 3:13 PM

So my boyfriend and I have been living together for a little over a year now. He is dealing with a couple issues that we are both curious as to how much food effects them.

First, sometimes (I'd say about half and half) in the mornings, he is not able to last very long, because of (from what I understand) heightened arousal. At other times during the day, if he is interested, there is almost never that issue.

That brings me to my second question about libido in general. About a week ago, he was telling me that there were several days where he was.. let's just say much more eager than usual... A day or two ago, he was saying that dropped off, and seems lower than his norm. I often have a hard time getting him interested in the evenings, but once I do, there's no issue.

We JUST started eating Paleo, I mean, starting this weekend is when we really dove in. Prior to this, we ate good quality meats (grass fed, etc), veggies, but also had a lot of whole grains and stuff like that. We also got into a bad habit, which we gradually improved on, of eating out too much (honestly, it was laziness). He is 31.

EDIT - I should add, that it's not an issue for me. Just something HE is having concerns about.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 16, 2012
at 10:40 PM

It's a ground tree bark.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 16, 2012
at 09:57 PM

I think taking special powders though is not very natural and best avoided.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 16, 2012
at 09:57 PM

Yes, and if you're relatively young what you say about it being quite quick early on is perfectly too and longer lasting if it's repeated a second time during the day.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 16, 2012
at 09:50 PM

^^^^ if he supplements his diet with the above, I guarantee he'll be an animal.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 16, 2012
at 09:24 PM

Yohimbe will definitely work. Buy the good stuff... a big bag of powder. Start with half teaspoon a day. Also, saw palmetto, stinging nettle root, soy lecithin. More egg yolks, fatty beef, sardines, almonds, Brazil nuts. Arginine every night at bed, zinc every other night.

61ea4896b1ef898345051dcfadd70073

(193)

on September 11, 2012
at 12:32 AM

I never thought of it this way......since I started paleo about 6 months ago my libido has spiked....sadly my husband's hasn't caught up to me yet. You give me hope.

Ed983a42344945b1ff70fd9597a23493

on March 16, 2012
at 03:46 PM

Can you clarify what you're asking please...are you wondering if that is too much sex, not enough, or are you curious about the different arousal at different times of the day, or?

C4f1a0c70c4e0dea507c2e346c036bbd

on March 14, 2012
at 02:48 AM

https://www.facebook.com/CFRiverfront I follow them there. And they do have website as well. http://www.cfriverfront.com/ Meredith runs the one up at the riverfront. And the one in Newark is run by former coach at riverfront (he trained me for awhile) Ian. That one is called Hardbat crossfit. Unfortunately both are quite expensive.

65bba2aa1de77b31c373c1a390c43ca8

(423)

on March 14, 2012
at 12:19 AM

Awesome! I know where that is.. I go to the Planet Fitness down there. Do they have a schedule or anything of their speakers?

4781cf8ae1bfcb558dfb056af17bea94

(4359)

on March 13, 2012
at 06:29 PM

This post is ridiculous. Your bf's libido is on the high side of normal. What did you think?

518bce04b12cd77741237e1f61075194

(11577)

on March 13, 2012
at 04:49 PM

Haha, that is approximately 4x as much sex as I have as a 20 year old with my 21 year old boyfriend, and I though our libidos were okay. I think it's a personal thing, and people can feel like a partners libido is unusual if it doesn't match their own. Stress is also one of the biggest hits to libido. If he had a rougher day, more anxiety etc that could explain the day-to-day changes probably more accurately if your diet is consistent.

65bba2aa1de77b31c373c1a390c43ca8

(423)

on March 13, 2012
at 04:43 PM

It's different from week to week... I'd say we have sex in the mornings maybe 3-4 times a week (sometimes less), and in the evenings 1-2. Occasionally it's twice a day, but not usually.. His libido definitely seems to be higher in the morning (as in, more eager without persuasion), and I know that has something to do with how the T levels fall over the day. I'm 24, turning 25 in a just under a month.

0a2dd50f2d3951bf3fb83fc4638c9512

(1960)

on March 13, 2012
at 03:59 PM

Without more details on frequency, it's hard to say. But it doesn't sound unusual at all. How old are you?

0bc6cbb653cdc5e82400f6da920f11eb

(19245)

on March 13, 2012
at 03:47 PM

Are you having sex every morning and evening? :)

65bba2aa1de77b31c373c1a390c43ca8

(423)

on March 13, 2012
at 03:43 PM

How many times a week is what?

0bc6cbb653cdc5e82400f6da920f11eb

(19245)

on March 13, 2012
at 03:38 PM

How many times a week is that?

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9 Answers

best answer

0
C4f1a0c70c4e0dea507c2e346c036bbd

on March 13, 2012
at 08:35 PM

I live in Wilmington too. Been paleo for 2 years. There is a crossfit at the Riverfront and one in Newark as well. They tend to have paleo guest speakers.

Get your BF to eat more fat, up his zinc consumption and maybe eat some vitamin c. Also heavy squat workouts help with testorone production as well as cold showers.

C4f1a0c70c4e0dea507c2e346c036bbd

on March 14, 2012
at 02:48 AM

https://www.facebook.com/CFRiverfront I follow them there. And they do have website as well. http://www.cfriverfront.com/ Meredith runs the one up at the riverfront. And the one in Newark is run by former coach at riverfront (he trained me for awhile) Ian. That one is called Hardbat crossfit. Unfortunately both are quite expensive.

65bba2aa1de77b31c373c1a390c43ca8

(423)

on March 14, 2012
at 12:19 AM

Awesome! I know where that is.. I go to the Planet Fitness down there. Do they have a schedule or anything of their speakers?

5
4b05d725a8332e8e917a4ca58b6e8a1e

(1239)

on March 13, 2012
at 05:08 PM

There is nothing abnormal about this. Libido isn't a constant, predictable state. Sometimes it's heightened, sometimes it's reduced depending on a wide variety of factors. Now, if an unusually low state of libido occurs lasting several weeks, then I'd start looking at some lifestyle and health issues.

4
Af005ec9a8e028f2b04bf5367b64e0d6

on March 13, 2012
at 04:56 PM

If you're having sex most days there's definitely no problem. Personally I think it's normal to just have some days where you aren't as "eager" as others... and especially if everything is still good once you "get him interested".

2
Db4ad76f6f307a6f577e175710049172

on March 13, 2012
at 06:04 PM

The reason why he might be more aroused in the morning is that men's testosterone level is highest in the morning, and then declines through the day.

If you want to get his sex drive really revving, have him eat a really high fat diet. 160g fat per day, the majority from butter, is what I do, and I'd say it works for me. There's also questions on PH where people talk about a carnivorous, high fat diet for women, and that their libido is through the roof.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 16, 2012
at 09:57 PM

Yes, and if you're relatively young what you say about it being quite quick early on is perfectly too and longer lasting if it's repeated a second time during the day.

1
Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

on December 16, 2012
at 09:21 PM

He's trying to tell you he wants you to be nastier. Trust me... problem solved.

0
75d65450b6ff0be7b969fb321f1200ac

(2506)

on December 16, 2012
at 09:47 PM

I agree with others have said. Healthy eating (paleo) is only half the requirement for bolstering libido. Good, hard physical training seems to work magic on keeping one's testosterone level up. There is probably a good scientific explanation for this involving hormone interactions and the health of one's adrenals ... but it's way over my head.

I will also say that when it comes to the notion of "normal sexual libido" one size does not fit all. Some guys can perform repeatedly both night and day indefinitely. Others are fully satiated with just a couple of sessions per week. I'm not sure if anyone can say which case is more representative of the norm. So I am saying there might not be anything at all deficient with your boyfriend's libido. If there is true concern you might want to both discuss the matter with medical specialist.

_Lazza

0
6f4425e3c7dc0efe60da531c5d991487

on December 16, 2012
at 09:18 PM

Not to associate "wood" with libido, but the supplement Yohimbe made it nearly impossible for me to sleep on my stomach.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 16, 2012
at 09:50 PM

^^^^ if he supplements his diet with the above, I guarantee he'll be an animal.

6fece842bd1bcf5724f458a302a2156e

(1169)

on December 16, 2012
at 09:57 PM

I think taking special powders though is not very natural and best avoided.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 16, 2012
at 09:24 PM

Yohimbe will definitely work. Buy the good stuff... a big bag of powder. Start with half teaspoon a day. Also, saw palmetto, stinging nettle root, soy lecithin. More egg yolks, fatty beef, sardines, almonds, Brazil nuts. Arginine every night at bed, zinc every other night.

Ed7403e397077dd1acdbf25c7f6e56ce

(3452)

on December 16, 2012
at 10:40 PM

It's a ground tree bark.

0
800547661e2d20d03f5a313d86eb6102

(155)

on March 16, 2012
at 01:25 PM

I'm 50 and I noticed that Paleo "living" has a lot to do with it, not just the "diet". Crossfit is a great workout, I'm a mountain biker and both can be very competitive = mental stress, increased cortisol levels.... With Crossfit in a gym environment it's even more so. He needs to go out and play! Read Mark Sisson.... Play is still a workout and because it's play, it's fun and not stressful. I find that on the days where I'm pushing myself hard to stay at the head of a pack, I'm not so "eager" at home, but on the days where I'm just out to have fun, get dirty, I'm ready to go home and get "down and dirty".... Also, those are the days (or nights) when I can go and go and go..... I'd bet to say that on Crossfit days, his libido is lower than on Play days! Take it from a 50 Year Old Dude who still thinks he's 24.

61ea4896b1ef898345051dcfadd70073

(193)

on September 11, 2012
at 12:32 AM

I never thought of it this way......since I started paleo about 6 months ago my libido has spiked....sadly my husband's hasn't caught up to me yet. You give me hope.

0
8164d298b993b3f6aa64cc6a09f637b1

(0)

on March 13, 2012
at 08:57 PM

I'll bet most guys are envious of that frequency! Especially us old guys. Ahhhh! To be young again.

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