best way to opt out of eating my dads food without making him feel bad?

Answered on August 19, 2014
Created November 03, 2011 at 2:16 AM

My big sibs (the only other cavepeople in my family) are both out of the house, so my dad is only cooking for me, my mother, and my little bro. The good thing is that he makes several dishes so I can pick out what I want. The bad thing is that he gets sad when I don't want his garlic bread and pasta. I've been paleo for a while but he just doesn't get it. Any advice?



on November 03, 2011
at 06:03 PM

when i go home the same thing happens, so if I'm on the toilet for 24 hours the next day they start to back off....but the next trip it starts all over again!



on November 03, 2011
at 01:21 PM

I wonder if there are decent paleo substitutes for garlic bread/pasta that wouldn't offend. Spaghetti squash or rice noodles (if you do rice) come to mind... Blanking on garlic bread - I have difficulty maintaining control when I get a whiff of it! My daughter has started baking pies and I will have a bite so as not to disappoint her.



on November 03, 2011
at 12:49 PM

Ahhhhh garlic bread and pasta...If there was one meal a week I took a cheat on that would be IT!



on November 03, 2011
at 11:33 AM

Irrelevant, but when I read the title of the thread quickly, I saw "best way to opt out of eating my dads FOOT without making him feel bad" ...


on November 03, 2011
at 04:47 AM

This is soooo sweet:) Just be honest with him, and remind him as often as necessary that choosing not to eat some of the food he offers is not a rejection of HIM. And let him know what you do like...



on November 03, 2011
at 03:19 AM

love is more important that food! :)

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8 Answers

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on November 03, 2011
at 02:58 AM

"Dad, you make the BEST pasta/garlic bread! Unfortunately, I'm avoiding wheat and gluten so I'll just take deep breaths and enjoy the delicious aromas." You see, dad put lots of love in the food so you need to give the love back without swallowing--if you're huggers, that hellps. It can be hard, though. :-))

I was typing this as Kewpie's answer came up so I think we're on the same wavelength.



on November 03, 2011
at 02:56 AM

For many people food is love. We could argue about whether or not it should be, but if that is how he feels the point is moot. Could you sit down with your dad--not during a meal time--and talk to him about it? Tell him how much you appreciate all the cooking he does and tell him some of the things he makes that you particularly enjoy. Tell him how important your dietary choices are to you and how committed you are to following them. Explain that your choice not to eat something he cooks is not a reflection of how much you love and appreciate him. Make it clear that while you aren't going to change your dietary views, you don't want them to be a point of contention in your relationship.

Avoid--during this conversation--talking about how avoiding grains is healthier or makes you feel better. It could be perceived as a personal insult. Keep the focus on how important it is to you to have a positive relationship with him.



on November 03, 2011
at 03:19 AM

love is more important that food! :)


on November 03, 2011
at 02:33 AM

I get together with my family for meals pretty regularly. My strategy is to be the cook, or at least help out. If that includes buying the groceries or making non-paleo options for others than so be it. I will admit to playing the gluten allergy card to some degree when needed and making small sacrifices myself for rare special events. Feeling a little sick is sometimes worth making a loved one happy by eating a small slice of homemade huckleberry pie. Partial substitutions are another option, I've cooked spaghetti squash so I wouldn't have to eat pasta and some of the family enjoys trying it as well.

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on November 03, 2011
at 04:37 AM

Perhaps you can bear in mind that he does what he does in the kitchen, with love. I know you don't want to eat garlic bread. Thank him, and if you can't find a way to pretend to eat it while not, consider that your respect for his intentions is infinitely more powerful than any simplistic bio-physical "effects of gluten."



on November 03, 2011
at 11:17 PM

"i love you dad, but this is pure garbage. Now get me a steak and stop jerking around, mkay?" and then give the softie a big Kiss. or a big punch in the face



on November 03, 2011
at 10:53 PM

Well, you can always tell him you love the taste of pasta, but it makes you fat and your periods worse. We guys always tend to perk up and pay attention with those two situations around females.



on November 03, 2011
at 04:33 AM

I am the only paleo in my family. My main goal is for them to keep the meat and the wheat seperate. Which they now do. But it took awhile.



on November 03, 2011
at 02:49 AM

Can't you say you're not a fan of pasta and bread and just eat the meat and veggies? Tell him they're too bland (cause they really are) and that you'd rather eat more meat. And have you tried explaining to him why you eat a Paleo style diet in the first place? Maybe he'd understand better if you did.

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