29

votes

Are you afraid of death? Yes, you.

Answered on September 12, 2014
Created December 22, 2011 at 6:51 PM

To many, living "paleo" means living a more natural life. Fewer cheetos, more raw cheddar. Less worrying, more walking. Less sick days, more sex days. (<----is that true?)

The end of life is called "death". Some of us try to delay this with prudent dietary tweaks and supplementation. We can hack all we want, but chances are that we will all die. Kurt Harris writes...

"So I would encourage you to ask yourself, what are you looking for? Do you think there is a "secret"? Are you fantasizing about immortality? Is everything a tweak or a hack or a trick? Do you think every problem in your life can be fixed by changing your diet? Or do you see life as complex and tragic but sweet and rewarding, and are happy just to stack the odds in your favor with diet and then get on about your other business?"

It strikes me that the basic nature of paleo writing/blogging/hacking is very life-affirming. But life is not always rainbows and slow-cooked meat. It can be very tragic. People have thought about death and written about tragedy forever. Now that most of us don't die from infection/accidents/war, tragedy is just so passe. I looked through paleohacks and found almost nothing about death. How often do you think about death? Are you afraid of death?

9ffe43c6c5990ed710c7c49b12d6ee7f

on April 07, 2012
at 10:43 AM

Same - it's not that a fear of death turns me on to paleo; living in pain is far scarier to me. Emotional pain - like dying young from cancer - or physical pain - like chemo, broken bones, calcium-depleted teeth - are two things I want to prevent as much as possible in my life.

77877f762c40637911396daa19b53094

(78467)

on April 07, 2012
at 01:07 AM

Ahhh yes I see the "He who is without sin throw the first stone" is still preached and not followed among the faithful.

6714718e2245e5190017d643a7614157

on February 02, 2012
at 05:08 PM

+1 I like your answer AB.

95eda9fa0cec952b482e869c34a566b6

on December 28, 2011
at 02:40 AM

Thrown on some Barry White to kick those telomores up a notch old school style.

0bd9775b305d2a602d496649982bc614

(252)

on December 24, 2011
at 12:04 AM

also my answer..

25b139cc1954456d9ea469e40f984cd3

on December 23, 2011
at 04:51 PM

You had an experience in which you nearly died; you did not have a near-death experience. NDEs usually (almost invariably?) drive adults away from religions--this is particularly true with authoritarian, centralized, dogmatic, institutional groups such as Roman Catholicism.

66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

(12407)

on December 23, 2011
at 02:23 PM

u take copious amounts of coconut oil and mix with the 100% cacao nibs and rub them into your nipples for oxtocin release. it totally lengthens your telomeres. the malbec's there just to set the mood...

34b560c8b9ce660d7839fb7e29d7be89

on December 23, 2011
at 01:55 PM

Man you sure hit the nail on the head at the end there. I remember vividly a conversation I had with an old girlfriend. She asked if I'd like to try the huckleberry pie she'd baked, I said "no thanks, I'm going for a run later." I immediately realized my mistake but it was too late, needless to say she never surprised me with any more treats. We don't always get another chance in cases like that.

34b560c8b9ce660d7839fb7e29d7be89

on December 23, 2011
at 01:40 PM

The part about making memories, that is so accurate. I read a book once that asked; *if your life were a book, would anyone want to read it?* It really stuck with me and I've always tried to make myself available to drop everything and head out on an adventure with those closest to me or just stay up a little longer when the conversation is getting good, whatever it takes to maximize the moments we'll both remember when we look back on it all.

34b560c8b9ce660d7839fb7e29d7be89

on December 23, 2011
at 01:33 PM

Fear of my own death has little effect on my thoughts and actions but losing others important to me has changed my perception. I had a vivid dream about my father dying after I blew up at him when I was like 17. The thought of something like that actually happening has made it easier to just let the minor bullshit slide, there are more important things in life.

A968087cc1dd66d480749c02e4619ef4

(20436)

on December 23, 2011
at 01:16 PM

So is that nibble massage? Wait, I'm confused. Do you rub the nibs with your nipples or the other way around? And how does the malbec fit in to all this? (By the way, Argentinian malbecs are really nice.)

95eda9fa0cec952b482e869c34a566b6

on December 23, 2011
at 10:58 AM

Oh yeah, that's right. See, I've not been keeping up with my cacao nibs therapy. New Year's resolution! 2012 and a better me.

71e078b9000a360364fd039bae64dabf

(125)

on December 23, 2011
at 10:28 AM

I didn't realise quite how profound that quote from Syrio was until i just re-read it here. Thanks conciliator.

25b139cc1954456d9ea469e40f984cd3

on December 23, 2011
at 06:28 AM

We'll have to agree to disagree on that one...

Cf32992bfa1907147c7cdc451bba9c63

(2890)

on December 23, 2011
at 06:23 AM

There is only one god, and his name is Death. And there is only one thing we say to Death: 'Not today.'

77877f762c40637911396daa19b53094

(78467)

on December 23, 2011
at 05:41 AM

"food coma" that is great! That's how it feels to be stuffed with thick crust pizza. I used to be such a foodie, recipes etc, now I enjoy each and every meal and never plan ahead or follow recipes.

Ed71ab1c75c6a9bd217a599db0a3e117

(25472)

on December 23, 2011
at 04:51 AM

Plus one...........

66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

(12407)

on December 23, 2011
at 02:53 AM

whaddaya think all the cacao nibs are for?

164ed7cd8d84c926bc66f366619bf853

(495)

on December 23, 2011
at 02:42 AM

I too do meditation on death. it's less scary when you accept it. Everything is impermanent.

164ed7cd8d84c926bc66f366619bf853

(495)

on December 23, 2011
at 02:40 AM

me too. thanks for such an honest post.

95eda9fa0cec952b482e869c34a566b6

on December 23, 2011
at 02:11 AM

Don't forget the nipple massages.

D1c02d4fc5125a670cf419dbb3e18ba7

on December 23, 2011
at 01:23 AM

My dad died of lymphoma. They gave him 1 month and he lived 18 months. He didn't really die of the cancer, but the chemo broke him down. Congestive heart failure in the end. He abused his health his whole life so in a sense he brought it on himself. But that doesn't make it hurt any less. If anything the exact opposite

D1c02d4fc5125a670cf419dbb3e18ba7

on December 23, 2011
at 01:20 AM

The Paleo mind and heart are where it's at. I don't know what exactly that means, but I can tell you my inquiry these days is primarily focused on this.

D1c02d4fc5125a670cf419dbb3e18ba7

on December 23, 2011
at 01:19 AM

Sorry for your loss too Sara. First and foremost - let go of all of the meaningless bullshit in your life that seems so important but isn't. Live the life you want to live, not what others expect you to. Realize that the best way to love others is to love yourself. Chillax. Smile. I could go on, but it would be a LONG time before anything related to diet and nutrition came up. Don't get me wrong - diet and nutrition are so important, but that is the easiest thing of all IMO. We don't need more hacking to lead a good physical life. ...

7841848bd0c27c64353c583fb7971242

(7275)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:59 AM

I'm sorry for your loss, Aravind. Your story is similar to mine (see below). What did your dad die of? If you could go back and give 25-year-old Aravind advice, what would it be?

E7e57f3e3a156df4072ca85d463f8ed3

(358)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:59 AM

Lucky for him he didn't make it to the imbecilic stage before his death last week.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:17 AM

i should have known game of thrones is up your alley.

C0fcb48d7da4f76fac17318efd2cd6b8

(4069)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:10 AM

Love this: "...my bodymind feels twenty years old again. I am returning to that youthful naivety. I am not trying to stop what is occuring. Time enough later to worry about death. When I spend 24/7 in this Paleo/chelation zone, there is little time to think about death. I sort of wasted my first 55 years, walking aroung sick/toxic. I am ready to start living for a change.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:06 AM

Oooh, good/different answer! Chelation, to boot.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:04 AM

Indeed, one of my favorite sayings...http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memento_mori

96bf58d8c6bd492dc5b8ae46203fe247

(37227)

on December 22, 2011
at 11:42 PM

"No one can go back and start a new beginning at life, but any one of us can start today and make a new ending to our life." My new favorite quote.

778b36f4f699f202de135ef176fe9ab7

(1123)

on December 22, 2011
at 11:41 PM

Absolutely! When I go, I want to be sleeping, in my bed and just stop breathing or something. I don't want to suffer. I'm a wuss too...

9d43f6873107e17ca4d1a5055aa7a2ad

on December 22, 2011
at 09:56 PM

valar morghulis

B6114a1980b1481fb18206064f3f4a4f

(3924)

on December 22, 2011
at 09:04 PM

I'm not afraid of death, but as a 43 year-old single mom of twin pre-schoolers, I'm terribly afraid of leaving them without a parent.

D1c02d4fc5125a670cf419dbb3e18ba7

on December 22, 2011
at 08:03 PM

Well I am a Sith lord after all. My apprentice should be here any minute now - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3P3agxdjpFs

Ce7e28769d92d5de5533e775b1de966e

on December 22, 2011
at 08:03 PM

This is good to hear, Kamal! My evil plan is working! Just one of the ways that I was raised, a blend of commune style and a grammie who pounded in "Do unto others, Peaches, treat every day as if it were your last!"- she didn't get to babysit me much. It just rolled to another level when I had friends/family pass away. And emoticons just always make it better.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:55 PM

Good answer Kumar. I thought you might opine. My specialty is setting you up for answers. Gotta think of a good one at AHS12.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:36 PM

I never knew that JSJ. My personal opinion is that you are doing a great job of being a positive influence, at least based on paleohacks and facebook posts and number of smiley emoticons used.

0dbd7154d909b97fe774d1655754f195

(16131)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:32 PM

Having kids is what made me start thinking about death in a for real kind of way. Mine are 2 and 5 as well.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:26 PM

Yay fibro cure!!

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:23 PM

^^^side conversation to balance out death talk

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:23 PM

More sex days??

66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

(12407)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:17 PM

i definitely feel that if i can stretch those telomeres just a bit longer, i'll definitely break all records!!! i have 100lb bags of cacao nibs and barrels of malbec at the ready!!!

244e1f82efb3fd15d2da39397488fb24

(549)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:16 PM

The way I have always understood it was that we have the genetic potential to live to 120 years of age. If you can beat that, you'll be breaking records all over the map!

1d0497f8781845ab371b479455bfee8e

(11157)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:11 PM

Took the words right out of my mouth! :)

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:11 PM

That is great. Kids are great :)

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37 Answers

24
D30ff86ad2c1f3b43b99aed213bcf461

on December 22, 2011
at 07:06 PM

I came nose to nose with my mortality fairly early - at age 19 I was diagnosed with malignant melanoma, and now I have a very sizable scar on my leg testifying to the experience.

Anyway, could I get melanoma again? Sure - in fact I bank on that possibility by having regular visits to the dermatologist to check for abnormalities. Will a paleo lifestyle guarantee me never having a melanoma again? Nope. It might well push the odds in my favor, but I still get biopsies done on spots most of the time, because I know that nothing is certain.

Similarly, I could get killed in traffic, or some other tragedy. Paleo is not a fix-all, and it doesn't guarantee long life free of illness or sorrow. It just increases your chances of living a longer, more physically comfortable life.

I think that striving for optimal nutrition 100% of the time - in a bid for immortality - is not only futile, but ultimately has the potential to be a bit soul-crushing. What good is living to 120 fit years old if your friends and family died long ago - and you repeatedly refused their offers of occasional social/seasonal indulgence based on your pursuit of a perfectly fit life? The tradeoff there has to be carefully evaluated.

34b560c8b9ce660d7839fb7e29d7be89

on December 23, 2011
at 01:55 PM

Man you sure hit the nail on the head at the end there. I remember vividly a conversation I had with an old girlfriend. She asked if I'd like to try the huckleberry pie she'd baked, I said "no thanks, I'm going for a run later." I immediately realized my mistake but it was too late, needless to say she never surprised me with any more treats. We don't always get another chance in cases like that.

24
66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

on December 22, 2011
at 07:05 PM

i'm calorie restricting and taking resveratrol. i'm going to live to a 130, bitches. someone on this board told me that so it must be true, right?

66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

(12407)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:17 PM

i definitely feel that if i can stretch those telomeres just a bit longer, i'll definitely break all records!!! i have 100lb bags of cacao nibs and barrels of malbec at the ready!!!

244e1f82efb3fd15d2da39397488fb24

(549)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:16 PM

The way I have always understood it was that we have the genetic potential to live to 120 years of age. If you can beat that, you'll be breaking records all over the map!

95eda9fa0cec952b482e869c34a566b6

on December 23, 2011
at 02:11 AM

Don't forget the nipple massages.

95eda9fa0cec952b482e869c34a566b6

on December 23, 2011
at 10:58 AM

Oh yeah, that's right. See, I've not been keeping up with my cacao nibs therapy. New Year's resolution! 2012 and a better me.

66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

(12407)

on December 23, 2011
at 02:23 PM

u take copious amounts of coconut oil and mix with the 100% cacao nibs and rub them into your nipples for oxtocin release. it totally lengthens your telomeres. the malbec's there just to set the mood...

66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

(12407)

on December 23, 2011
at 02:53 AM

whaddaya think all the cacao nibs are for?

95eda9fa0cec952b482e869c34a566b6

on December 28, 2011
at 02:40 AM

Thrown on some Barry White to kick those telomores up a notch old school style.

A968087cc1dd66d480749c02e4619ef4

(20436)

on December 23, 2011
at 01:16 PM

So is that nibble massage? Wait, I'm confused. Do you rub the nibs with your nipples or the other way around? And how does the malbec fit in to all this? (By the way, Argentinian malbecs are really nice.)

14
D1c02d4fc5125a670cf419dbb3e18ba7

on December 22, 2011
at 07:51 PM

Provocative but wonderful question Kumar!

Fear of death is what led me to my nutritional inquiry (in addition to a spiritual inquiry). My father died at age 52 when I was 23. I am 42 now and am still fearful. I don't expect to live forever but I fear dying with MANY regrets in life, not seeing my daughter grow up, and not being able to look in the mirror at least one day before my last and truly feel at peace.

Every man dies, not every man really lives. I hope someday to live

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1G_Bzu52DY

D1c02d4fc5125a670cf419dbb3e18ba7

on December 23, 2011
at 01:20 AM

The Paleo mind and heart are where it's at. I don't know what exactly that means, but I can tell you my inquiry these days is primarily focused on this.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:55 PM

Good answer Kumar. I thought you might opine. My specialty is setting you up for answers. Gotta think of a good one at AHS12.

D1c02d4fc5125a670cf419dbb3e18ba7

on December 23, 2011
at 01:19 AM

Sorry for your loss too Sara. First and foremost - let go of all of the meaningless bullshit in your life that seems so important but isn't. Live the life you want to live, not what others expect you to. Realize that the best way to love others is to love yourself. Chillax. Smile. I could go on, but it would be a LONG time before anything related to diet and nutrition came up. Don't get me wrong - diet and nutrition are so important, but that is the easiest thing of all IMO. We don't need more hacking to lead a good physical life. ...

D1c02d4fc5125a670cf419dbb3e18ba7

on December 22, 2011
at 08:03 PM

Well I am a Sith lord after all. My apprentice should be here any minute now - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3P3agxdjpFs

D1c02d4fc5125a670cf419dbb3e18ba7

on December 23, 2011
at 01:23 AM

My dad died of lymphoma. They gave him 1 month and he lived 18 months. He didn't really die of the cancer, but the chemo broke him down. Congestive heart failure in the end. He abused his health his whole life so in a sense he brought it on himself. But that doesn't make it hurt any less. If anything the exact opposite

7841848bd0c27c64353c583fb7971242

(7275)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:59 AM

I'm sorry for your loss, Aravind. Your story is similar to mine (see below). What did your dad die of? If you could go back and give 25-year-old Aravind advice, what would it be?

34b560c8b9ce660d7839fb7e29d7be89

on December 23, 2011
at 01:33 PM

Fear of my own death has little effect on my thoughts and actions but losing others important to me has changed my perception. I had a vivid dream about my father dying after I blew up at him when I was like 17. The thought of something like that actually happening has made it easier to just let the minor bullshit slide, there are more important things in life.

6714718e2245e5190017d643a7614157

on February 02, 2012
at 05:08 PM

+1 I like your answer AB.

14
8e5a53df514e078421eb8c7cf89d3ca5

(466)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:13 PM

I'm with Christopher Hitchens on this one:

???Do I fear death? No, I am not afraid of being dead because there's nothing to be afraid of, I won't know it. I fear dying, of dying I feel a sense of waste about it and I fear a sordid death, where I am incapacitated or imbecilic at the end which isn't something to be afraid of, it's something to be terrified of.???

E7e57f3e3a156df4072ca85d463f8ed3

(358)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:59 AM

Lucky for him he didn't make it to the imbecilic stage before his death last week.

25b139cc1954456d9ea469e40f984cd3

on December 23, 2011
at 06:28 AM

We'll have to agree to disagree on that one...

77877f762c40637911396daa19b53094

(78467)

on April 07, 2012
at 01:07 AM

Ahhh yes I see the "He who is without sin throw the first stone" is still preached and not followed among the faithful.

11
22212e9ba2a041e6da6c963d4d41615a

(5773)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:09 PM

Now that I am a father of two (2 and 5), I'm not sure if I am afraid of death or the fact that death would leave my kids fatherless and cause them pain. Each and every day I see what I mean to them and how much they love me, and I wouldn't want that to be taken from them until it was expected.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:11 PM

That is great. Kids are great :)

B6114a1980b1481fb18206064f3f4a4f

(3924)

on December 22, 2011
at 09:04 PM

I'm not afraid of death, but as a 43 year-old single mom of twin pre-schoolers, I'm terribly afraid of leaving them without a parent.

0dbd7154d909b97fe774d1655754f195

(16131)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:32 PM

Having kids is what made me start thinking about death in a for real kind of way. Mine are 2 and 5 as well.

11
7dc950fc76a046048e683d2a27dced37

on December 22, 2011
at 07:02 PM

Now that I'm closer to it than a lot of PHers, I think about it more often. I find that I'm not afraid of death ... but I must admit to being afraid of of a painful death. I'm a wuss that way.

1d0497f8781845ab371b479455bfee8e

(11157)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:11 PM

Took the words right out of my mouth! :)

778b36f4f699f202de135ef176fe9ab7

(1123)

on December 22, 2011
at 11:41 PM

Absolutely! When I go, I want to be sleeping, in my bed and just stop breathing or something. I don't want to suffer. I'm a wuss too...

9ffe43c6c5990ed710c7c49b12d6ee7f

on April 07, 2012
at 10:43 AM

Same - it's not that a fear of death turns me on to paleo; living in pain is far scarier to me. Emotional pain - like dying young from cancer - or physical pain - like chemo, broken bones, calcium-depleted teeth - are two things I want to prevent as much as possible in my life.

10
Medium avatar

(12379)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:39 PM

Of course I'm afraid of death. I'm afraid to miss out on one moment with my family and friends. I'm afraid to not be here for my son when he needs me. But I'm more afraid of any of my family members or friends dying because the pain of being without them would be immense.

I don't know if I'm on the 'paleo' train for longevity or to increase the quality of the days and years that I have. I think the latter because luckily I haven't really faced death myself.

10
Ce7e28769d92d5de5533e775b1de966e

on December 22, 2011
at 07:34 PM

After losing the bulk of my family over the years to the craziest shit ever - we're talking along the same lines of toilets from space, the body wearing out from so many years - yay longevity!, and maybe a strange illness or two, I'm not afraid to die. But..

What I'm afraid of is how it will affect those that I leave behind. In general I truly hate to see anyone hurt or sad that is in my life, friends on up, so I try at all times to be happy and say it all now. Be affectionate, give little gifts from my heart, create memories, show the care now - no waiting!, so maybe, just maybe, when I'm gone I will be missed with smiles and bad jokes about the dumb crap I've done over the years with the tears and not just the tears.

I know, might be weird worrying about everyone else, but taking care of people who have passed away really made me take a look at how I was living and how I wanted to go out. I live each day and do everything possible to not have any regrets. Of course that's harder than it sounds, and I do fuck up now and then, but it's a learning process right up until the end.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:36 PM

I never knew that JSJ. My personal opinion is that you are doing a great job of being a positive influence, at least based on paleohacks and facebook posts and number of smiley emoticons used.

Ce7e28769d92d5de5533e775b1de966e

on December 22, 2011
at 08:03 PM

This is good to hear, Kamal! My evil plan is working! Just one of the ways that I was raised, a blend of commune style and a grammie who pounded in "Do unto others, Peaches, treat every day as if it were your last!"- she didn't get to babysit me much. It just rolled to another level when I had friends/family pass away. And emoticons just always make it better.

34b560c8b9ce660d7839fb7e29d7be89

on December 23, 2011
at 01:40 PM

The part about making memories, that is so accurate. I read a book once that asked; *if your life were a book, would anyone want to read it?* It really stuck with me and I've always tried to make myself available to drop everything and head out on an adventure with those closest to me or just stay up a little longer when the conversation is getting good, whatever it takes to maximize the moments we'll both remember when we look back on it all.

10
Ed983a42344945b1ff70fd9597a23493

on December 22, 2011
at 07:20 PM

Well, I had a "guru" once tell me that humans are programmed to live at least 120 years in perfect health, and that regeneration is possible in every case, that there is a cure for everything. At some point I definitely got these ideas deeply ingrained in my skull...that I could fix all that ails me if I could just find the right tweak to my diet. I've let that go. I think about death a lot. I have fears around death(my own, my husband's and my children's especially) that I strive to face, and also strive not to dwell on. Death is as much a part of life as birth is...I think my biggest fear around my own death is not having lived a life worthy of being remembered and held in the hearts of those that I love.

7
306aa57660d911781231f8090c2a5619

(3808)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:42 AM

I work in a nursing home.

At this point, I'm much more afraid of conditions causing one to end up in a nursing home than I am of death.

7
Ed71ab1c75c6a9bd217a599db0a3e117

(25472)

on December 22, 2011
at 11:29 PM

Do I fear death? No longer do I, but I used too.

When I was my former self I did. The reason is that I new I was not living the life I was born to live so I think I sensed that I had some regret. That regret fostered my fear of death. I sensed I was wasting my time instead of living it by following my purpose. Once I found my proper path in life my fear of death vanished.

Remembering that we are going to eventually die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you really have something to lose in life. In reality, we are already quite naked psychologically. There is absolutely no reason not to follow your heart or your passion in the here and now. If what you???re doing in life is not your passion, then you really have nothing to lose by changing now. When your not passionate about something in life.......you will fear death because you are not living the life you were born to live. I realized this brutal fact in 2006. So i decided to adapt and evolve my lifestyle and my way of thinking to follow my passion. I decided not to have regrets later in my life about this issue.

20 years from now, I will not be disappointed by the things I didn???t do, rather I will rejoice in the conquests I took on regardless of the feat. One day our life will flash before our eyes and I plan on saying I made it worth living for. It doesn???t matter where you are right now, you are nowhere compared to where you might go. No one can go back and start a new beginning at life, but any one of us can start today and make a new ending to our life.

No.......I no longer fear death.

96bf58d8c6bd492dc5b8ae46203fe247

(37227)

on December 22, 2011
at 11:42 PM

"No one can go back and start a new beginning at life, but any one of us can start today and make a new ending to our life." My new favorite quote.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:04 AM

Indeed, one of my favorite sayings...http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memento_mori

7
77877f762c40637911396daa19b53094

(78467)

on December 22, 2011
at 09:49 PM

My father was an undertaker. We lived over the business. By my rough estimation I have been housemates to 3200 corpses in my basement. I lived on the third floor. I also did about 200 "removals"ie, pick ups from the hospitals, nursing homes and private houses with him. SOME WERE STILL QUITE WARM. He REALLY enjoyed this part of the business. WOW! For me, meh! In fact as you can imagine funerals were very "festive" times for us on the third floor.Each funeral gave my father the opportunity to put his daughter, son and grandson through college that much easier. Perhaps this has made my view of death different than the average PHer or SADEer. When my life gets bleak, I practice the Buddist meditation tool of thinking about my own death. It WORKS EVERYTIME. I cheer right up! Perhaps it's easier when death has such positive connection to your life. Also it help to know EXACTLY what death looks like! Weird huh!... The better my health gets on the Paleo diet and on mercury/lead/ aluminum chelation my view (fear) of death lessens further, since my bodymind feels twenty years old again. I am returning to that youthful naivety. I am not trying to stop what is occuring. Time enough later to worry about death. When I spend 24/7 in this Paleo/chelation zone, there is little time to think about death. I sort of wasted my first 55 years, walking aroung sick/toxic. I am ready to start living for a change.

164ed7cd8d84c926bc66f366619bf853

(495)

on December 23, 2011
at 02:42 AM

I too do meditation on death. it's less scary when you accept it. Everything is impermanent.

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:06 AM

Oooh, good/different answer! Chelation, to boot.

C0fcb48d7da4f76fac17318efd2cd6b8

(4069)

on December 23, 2011
at 12:10 AM

Love this: "...my bodymind feels twenty years old again. I am returning to that youthful naivety. I am not trying to stop what is occuring. Time enough later to worry about death. When I spend 24/7 in this Paleo/chelation zone, there is little time to think about death. I sort of wasted my first 55 years, walking aroung sick/toxic. I am ready to start living for a change.

7
Cf4576cbcc44fc7f2294135609bce9e5

on December 22, 2011
at 07:36 PM

before paleo i welcomed death to end my almost life long miserable life of pain and shear agony. Now i would like two life spans please.

164ed7cd8d84c926bc66f366619bf853

(495)

on December 23, 2011
at 02:40 AM

me too. thanks for such an honest post.

6
7841848bd0c27c64353c583fb7971242

(7275)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:32 PM

I thought I had a good perspective on death and dying until 2 years ago when my dad, in his mid 50s and still otherwise healthy, was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and died 3 weeks later. I miss him terribly, and I'm scared of having my life ripped away from me like that, with no time to process it or come to terms with it. It has made me rethink my values: I used to value workaholicism, but now I value family and friends more. And it has made me evaluate my health and figure out ways to reduce my risk of meeting a similar fate. I sometimes wonder, if I had learned about celiac disease and paleo sooner, could he still be around? If I put enough time in to learn about it now, will I prevent the same from happening to me?

6
363d0a0277a8b61ada3a24ab3ad85d5a

(4642)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:16 PM

I was obsessed with death as a little girl. I was raised Catholic so I at least thought I would have my whole family with me. As I got older, anytime I entered into a new relationship, or there was a new baby born in the family (or even when I got a new pet) - any new bond or love formation would make me think about its ultimate death or end and it became this new existential crisis over and over again. I guess right now I haven't been thinking about it as much, my focus is on living for a long and as healthfully as possible, but the idea of losing those that are close to me deeply saddens me, but it doesn't prevent me from forming new bonds or friendships. I have 5 siblings and I hate the idea of watching them get old and of them dying before me, not that I want to go first, but I see the wear of their lifestyles and eating choices and I want to stop it but, there is nothing I can do.

5
96bf58d8c6bd492dc5b8ae46203fe247

(37227)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:28 PM

Along with Beth-WeightMaven, I think about death more often now that I am approaching 65 and I am, according to the government, "young old."

Along with hemanvt, I worry about the impact my death would have on my 17-year-old grandson. He lives with me and there would be practical and emotional consequences. I also worry about my 3 toy dogs and 2 kitties--would they find good homes?

Along with Brent and Christopher Hitchens, if/when I worry it's about dying rather than being dead.

My goal is to extend the healthy, non-medicated and mobile portion of my life. I've already survived about 15 years of not being able to engage in true exercise; I'm limited to walking and a minimal amount of manual chores. Could I survive being chair- or bed-bound? I assume I could, but I don't like the thought of it. But that would be better than leaving the kid and the pets homeless.

4
742ff8ba4ff55e84593ede14ac1c3cab

(3536)

on December 22, 2011
at 09:42 PM

Not afraid of death, just dying.

0bd9775b305d2a602d496649982bc614

(252)

on December 24, 2011
at 12:04 AM

also my answer..

4
77877f762c40637911396daa19b53094

(78467)

on December 22, 2011
at 09:06 PM

Yes and no. Yes, I fear the pain and the clouding of my senses by pain and/or painkillers. No, it is moving on without the bio-mob and I was comforted by Steve Job's last words as reported by his sister "Wow.. Wow"

4
7e36094a0f7a2fbad24290225405220b

(2064)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:09 PM

I don't expect paleo to prolong my life but I hope it will keep me fitter for longer, so prolonging my active life. Life should be worth living!

3
6714718e2245e5190017d643a7614157

on April 06, 2012
at 07:52 PM

I think I am more afraid of poor health than I am of death, but I'm not 100% really sure. All my near death experiences happen when I am behind a steering wheel dodging all those crazy drivers who are using their cell phones while driving.

2
A905679417ee71c3f9e2d88964b3b1f0

(368)

on April 06, 2012
at 10:11 PM

I will start by saying this is very personal for me. Maybe talking about it will help, who knows? From the time I was about 4 I have suffered from quite severe OCD. There have been times when I would not eat as I was afraid everything was contaminated or poisoned, or drugged. When I was 20 I went from 240 pounds (which looks surprisingly fit on me, I am a stout 5'11") to 185 pounds in 5 months ( I look very sickly at that weight). How did I do this? By starvation. Not for dieting reasons but simply out of fear of putting things in my body. Behind all of the torturous things my brain has forced me to endure, they have all had one underlying factor; the fear of death. As recently as 2 months ago I would have about 3 full on panic attacks a day dwelling on dying. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't think, and I couldn't focus. If anyone who has had panic attacks knows, it is incredibly disabling while it is happening. I started taking Prozac again as it had helped when I was in my early 20's. It did, not great but I started only getting one panic attack a day. The day I started paleo dieting I stopped taking Prozac (I know probably not the best idea). Since then I have actually felt more stable than when I was on the pills and eating sandwiches and pasta all day. I am not on the diet because I feel it will help me live forever, but rather enjoy the days that I am alive much better. I am down to maybe 1-2 panic attacks a week. I rarely dwell on death, or that I may be dying, or that god what would I do if I found out I was terminally ill. Instead I am focused on something I can control (which I find very helpful with OCD; it was something my old psychologist told me that I never took to heart until now). I can control what I put in my body, I can control how much I exercise, and I can control how much effort I put in to my college education. It leaves little time for worry about death, or worry about being poisoned by same unseen enemy. I can't credit it all to the paleo lifestyle, but I can say this. I feel better now than I ever id before.

2
Ce41c230e8c2a4295db31aec3ef4b2ab

(32564)

on December 23, 2011
at 05:40 AM

Simply. No. Why?

I believe that our non-physical essence continues in some form...

2
Medium avatar

on December 23, 2011
at 12:20 AM

To be human is to fear death to some degree because it's the one thing above all else that shows us that our ability to be self aware and create our own destiny makes us different than all the other animals, yet we're still like them because of our mortality.

If we've lived our lives making it all about us and what we've done, we fear death more because it shows that we're not as significant as we think we are.

But there are two separate ways to look at the question. One is do we fear death when we face a near death situation, and we all do in a raw biological sense because of our primal flight or fight response, the other is do we fear the idea of death?

I think for many people that depends on whether they feel at this point in their lives they've led a meaningful life and have accomplished what they wanted to accomplish. What I fear more than death is not reaching my full potential and not changing my biggest flaws so that I can say I truly lived for others and for God rather than myself.
A person can be physically alive but emotionally and spiritually dead while still on this planet. I was in a near death experience myself in college where I fell from about 15 ft in the air to ground and was temporarily knocked unconscious. Up until that point I had never thought about death, although I always did think about God and spirituality to some degree. To make a long story short, the doctors in the ER all agreed I should've died, if I landed in any other position I would've broke my neck or hit my head, or at least been paralyzed for life. I only broke my pelvis, and even then I could've died from loss of blood. There was a chance I might not have been able to walk again or at least for a long time since they didn't know what nerves I might've damaged from the impact, but I was able to walk without crutches within a month. I'll never forget when I came back to get my xrays a month later, the giant crack in my pelvis was mostly gone and the doctor who seemed to be an atheist said, "I dunno if you should be thanking God but you should be thanking your lucky stars at least cause I've never seen anyone survive what you did and heal that quickly."
Sometimes we need to face death in order to start valuing life and question what we believe about ourselves and the world. I only share this story to make the point that many people need a wake up call, some of us like myself just need a bigger one than others. We should reflect on death and the afterlife (if you believe in one) from time to time because it makes us think about what we need to change right now to be a better person.
Maybe the better question is, what do you fear in life? I believe that if we conquer our fears and weaknesses in life we can be much more accepting and unafraid of death. I've made it my goal (I doubt I'll ever achieve it) for my ego to die before my mind and body do so I can be completely selfless and have no regrets about how I lived my life.

I just remembered the passage from the Bible that says "What good is it for a man to gain the whole world if he loses his soul?" I think that's relevant to this question. We should pursue optimal health to the fullest, but in the end I don't believe it should be the main purpose of our life. One can have perfect health but it means nothing if we don't use it for the right reasons. I think you can say that without health it seems as if nothing else in life matters, but without purpose, health doesn't matter. My life experiences have shown me that life can be amazing with great health, but suffering has value too. Without it we wouldn't be able to appreciate the things we take for granted as much, and it can teach us a lot about what our priorities are, who are true friends, etc, while making us stronger.

25b139cc1954456d9ea469e40f984cd3

on December 23, 2011
at 04:51 PM

You had an experience in which you nearly died; you did not have a near-death experience. NDEs usually (almost invariably?) drive adults away from religions--this is particularly true with authoritarian, centralized, dogmatic, institutional groups such as Roman Catholicism.

2
66974b2cb291799dcd661b7dec99a9e2

(11121)

on December 22, 2011
at 11:55 PM

No fear of death at all, it is a natural process for all living things. I do not live my life based on regrets, guilt, greed, fear, etc. When it is my time to die I will be content with what I have done in my life and will be ready for the next, natural step. Life is a partnership with death, everything we eat (the good stuff) was once alive and sacrificed it's essence so that we may live.

Modern man and especially Western society is very insulated from death. Up to maybe 100 years ago death was common place and accepted for what it is. When my people hunt we always thank the animal that we killed for giving its life so that we may live. We respect all life and understand the Universe.

2
Bfa1c9eacfc94a1b62f3a39b574480c6

(3700)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:06 PM

A Paleo, natural lifestyle will make it hard for death to come take you away, since our immune systems are rock solid, and our bodies are strong.

So in all technicality, I would not be afraid of dropping dead due to Western disease. But viruses? Ebola? Something from a level four containment lab? I'm a bit frightened by that.

1
78cb3c4f70de5db2adb52b6b9671894b

on April 07, 2012
at 09:29 AM

I am not scared of death itself. I'm not in the best of place at the moment, so I'm not afraid of it at all. I'm not aiming to live forever. But I am very scared of living the low-quality life that I am currently living forever. I am just desperately seeking a way out of this mental and physical prison so that I can take notice of what the world has to offer and I'm hoping that paleo will be a part of that.

And like others said here, I am only worried about how my death would affect my loved ones.

1
3c6b4eed18dc57f746755b698426e7c8

on April 07, 2012
at 06:20 AM

To not be afraid of death is to be against evolution. As evolving beings, how can we not try our darndest to delay death as long as possible? All animals try to avoid death. Yet, still, we commit suicide. Most common of all: many of us who've reached a state of infirmity want to be euthanized and take steps to be taken off of life support.

Sometimes, death is preferable to life, when the quality of life has sunk so low to be worth living any longer -- this happens when one has become so enfeebled, invalid, and senile.

Doesn't Paleo mean preventing this for as long as possible by doing all you can to optimize your diet, exercise routines, and lifestyle habits? Paleo does not mean just numerical longevity. It is rather an effort to slow the aging process (and the progress of degenerative conditions) by aging gracefully both in mind and spirit, rather than grotesquely. Thus keeping the quality of life from sinking so low that death is in fact preferable to life. No one wants to die after a prolonged illness. But this is happening more and more today as we suffer from umpteen diseases of civilization and incurable autoimmune diseases. If you died without having compromised your quality of life, well, then, your passing was in the Paleo spirit.

So the answer is: yes, of course, we should fear death. First because we're wired to fear death and prefer life to death. But also because, having lived "clean", life SHOULD be preferable to death.

1
0fb8b3d6dcfb279b0f7e050d2d22510f

(4645)

on April 07, 2012
at 02:06 AM

At my age- no, no longer am I, but Paleo has allowed me to die feeling young and not a cripple old man in a senior home. That I like

1
518bce04b12cd77741237e1f61075194

(11577)

on April 07, 2012
at 12:38 AM

Some of the people who have seemed the most "off" to me are health gurus that are obsessed with evading death. It puts the spring in their step and a mad sparkle in their eye to add miniscule amounts of time to their life by doing such-and-such a thing, hoping that it will all add up. I met this one guy once that was just obsessed- he believes 100% that he will age to at least 115. He just has this number in his head, and his whole life is based around getting there. I was profoundly uncomfortable talking to him and being around him because we had absolutely nothing in common in the way we lived life, viewed life, and viewed death.

I was born with a heart condition and the first time I got a really huge episode of arrhythmia I thought I was dying. I was so shocked I just sat in the bathroom at school and resigned myself to dying of a heart attack at the age of 8. I was actually picturing head lines, because I was sure I would be some crazy medical anomaly. Every arrhythmia since has a similar feeling- the struggling to breath, ridiculously tight chest, violently shaking muscles, and this feeling like you are just slowly receding from their world into some kind of black space. It gave me perspective at a young age that, hey, through no fault of your own or others, you can die at any time. It sounds cliched, but things just happen for no reason. No one's running a meter and you are not "entitled" to live the next few minutes. I don't want to live like those gurus who fight for every possible minute there may be in the distant future- I want to live NOW and fight for what I have here. That's the only thing that's worth it for me.

1
A968087cc1dd66d480749c02e4619ef4

(20436)

on December 23, 2011
at 01:22 PM

Ah gits weary
An' sick of tryin'
Ah'm tired of livin'
An' skeered of dyin',
But ol' man river,
He jes'keeps rolling' along.

1
71e078b9000a360364fd039bae64dabf

on December 23, 2011
at 10:24 AM

Wow, there have been some really great answers to this question.

Me, i'm not sure if i'm afraid of death or not. At the moment i'm wrestling with quitting my normal successful job in academia and joing the marines. I guess if i do then i'm fairly unafraid.

Actually, I sort of know the answer already. Death? I don't mind the prospect. I am terrified of serious injury though, like losing a limb. I love sport too much.

1
25b139cc1954456d9ea469e40f984cd3

on December 23, 2011
at 06:57 AM

Not at all. I quite look forward to it, though I do wish to make certain that when I go, certain things are taken care, from the meaningful--making sure my loved ones (human and/or animal) are taken of--to the mundane--making sure my hovel is clean. And also that I've accomplished a few things I've yet to tick off my "Things To Do Before I Leave" list. While a line from Dylan's "Up To Me" has a deep resonance-- "It frightens me, the awful truth of how sweet life can be", the "thousand natural shocks That flesh is heir to" have left their mark on me over the past decade or so and made my corporeal self feel far less like a home and more like a meat puppet or soul cage I will be only too happy to slough off when the time of transition comes.

For the Hitchens fans out there, however, Larkin's Aubade may be of interest: http://www.poemhunter.com/best-poems/philip-larkin/aubade/

I have far greater affinity for http://www.itemvn.com/song/Bob-Dylan-Highlands-Time-Out-of-Mind/A5BFA05166 .

1
8949bf87b0e0aefcad10f29975e4fa2b

(8989)

on December 23, 2011
at 06:44 AM

I am not much afraid of death. I am much more afraid of living, or afraid of not having lived enough, or of having lived an irrelevant life.

1
2b4f887f5fd32a37c6038eb0aaaf3bf5

on December 23, 2011
at 05:07 AM

Nope! I quite look forward to it, the ultimate adventure. However, I'm not suicidal, and plan to have a nice long life (Paleo or SAD). So, I can choose that the years in between be filled with energy, full health, strength, and preventative dr care only; or I can choose it to be filled with medication, obesity, diabetes, heart attacks, and surgery. Yes, I'm sure that paleo will edge the dial to a longer life, but that doesn't matter to me. It isn't like it is going to be the difference between dying at 35 and 95, more like the difference between 75 and 85. What matters to me is every day between now and that last day, being lived to the full capacity of my body. Living in a manner where I respected myself and my life, and fully enjoyed it and not passing the days by living it in a food coma.

That is why I choose Paleo.

77877f762c40637911396daa19b53094

(78467)

on December 23, 2011
at 05:41 AM

"food coma" that is great! That's how it feels to be stuffed with thick crust pizza. I used to be such a foodie, recipes etc, now I enjoy each and every meal and never plan ahead or follow recipes.

1
77877f762c40637911396daa19b53094

(78467)

on December 22, 2011
at 08:11 PM

I wouldn't say I'm afraid of death as long as it doesn't come too soon like some friends and acquaintances have experienced in the past few years.

If living Paleo can keep me healthy enough to avoid nasty diseases and cancers, hallelujah. If it helps me live life relatively pain free and keeps me mobile longer- great.

My father died at 75 years, somewhat assisted by drinking, and my mother died at 90 1/2 years old after getting first dementia and then Alzheimers.

The Paleo in me is trying to work around things that may lead to me following my mother's course of events.

I try to appreciate family, friends and acquaintances regularly. That way, if I should go suddenly at any time, they will all know I loved them. I try to enjoy my surroundings and do fun things that make me laugh. I play in the dirt a lot.

If I have anything to say about it, I would prefer to die in my sleep without knowing it happened. But if not, I hope not to be incapacitated or living in severe pain for any length of time.

And I hope to collect my pension (starting next May) for a long, long time.

1
244e1f82efb3fd15d2da39397488fb24

(549)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:23 PM

As long as I don't die in terrible screaming agony or by some sort of trauma (fire, drowning, etc) - if the death is either peaceful, or instantaneous, then I'm all for it! A lot of people think that I sound morbid, but the truth is that I am far too curious about what comes next to care. I don't even care about what gets left behind or unifinished because a mysterious afterlife, or non-physical life, if you will, awaits! Life extends beyond the physical, and I have researched quantum physics for too long to not see how incredibly beautiful everything is in life. No, I do not fear death. I can't understand people who do. To me, this was hell. It was hell on Earth for me, because I was depressed and had fibromyalgia. Once I went Paleo I became healthy (HAH! Doctors said I couldn't cure fibromyalgia!!) and now I love, love, LOVE life. Things I once thought to be lame are now incredible and joyful. If I can feel this way while restricted by physical and chemical (emotional) limitations, what must I be able to experience when I'm no longer in need of a physical body?

Also, what got me into paleo was how natural everything is. You cannot have life without death. The circle of life is exactly based on this mechanism. I won't break down the obvious for you, but instead exend it to the very planet itself: we could NOT exist here today, had a sun not died here first. From the incredible heat the sun is capable of, fusion occurs and we have minerals that life depends on here on Earth because of it. After the sun died, these masses formed and life became possible. To me, that is one of the first links in the chain of the circle of life. If you want to read about all the crazy life in soil that makes plant life possible, and how this circle ties into that, Lierre Keith who wrote The Vegetairan Myth explains it very nicely in the first chapter, and extends it outward from there. We cannot eat without taking life. I said ALL that to justify saying this: I don't want to live forever because eventually, I want my borrowed nutrients to return to the earth and become recycled, turned into something else. Give life to something else, since I've been given the same graces for all of my life. When I watched the movie Avatar, I was mesmorized by the Naavi simply because of what I heard one say in the film - it went something like "we live on borrowed energy. At the end of life, it must be returned" - something to that extent. I was touched, because I had been saying the same thing, but with "nutrients." So it just feels right that my turn should eventually come up, and return all the nutrients and energy to the Earth.

Admittingly, this is something I think about a lot. The mystery of life, of existence, is something that has perplexed me since I was a small child. My philosophy would take days of discussion to understand, so this is, believe it or not, my short answer.

But that's just what I think - to each his own, I say!

21fd060d0796fdb8a4a990441e08eae7

(24543)

on December 22, 2011
at 07:26 PM

Yay fibro cure!!

0
A089b683ee0498f2b21b7edfa300e405

on December 23, 2011
at 04:29 AM

This may be a strange answer, but this is the core experience of many eastern mystics.

Death is not the end, it is the very peak of life. It is not something like an accident which happens to life, it is something which grows in the very heart of life. It grows and comes to a peak.

Life is spread over several years; death happens in a single moment. It is so condensed that if you have lived your life well, you will be able to enter into the mystery of death. And the mystery of death is that it is only a cover: inside is your immortality, your eternal life.

Remember, it is possible to relax only when death is a certainty. Relaxing is difficult when things are uncertain. If you know that you are going to die today, all fear of death will disappear??? So live today and everyday, as if this your last day.

Kamal, this advise comes from the land of your ancestors.

Ed71ab1c75c6a9bd217a599db0a3e117

(25472)

on December 23, 2011
at 04:51 AM

Plus one...........

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