6

votes

Are smurfs paleo?

Answered on August 19, 2014
Created September 16, 2011 at 1:53 PM

Sure, their diet isn't great. Mostly bread, plants, ... and no meat. But aren't they the perfect "tribe"?

Af005ec9a8e028f2b04bf5367b64e0d6

(2797)

on September 16, 2011
at 09:10 PM

Actually, at least that cereal is rice, and the oils are Coconut and Palm. Much better than almost anything else I've seen on the shelf. That is definitely cereal I would cheat with. Can we still get that? Getting drunk and eating a box of smurf berry crunch is way more epic than getting drunk and separating a cheesecake from the graham cracker crust.

77877f762c40637911396daa19b53094

(78467)

on September 16, 2011
at 08:42 PM

this is lovely funny:) thank you...

27e79ef3308bb5f2d7bd04ee7eea7b79

(2038)

on September 16, 2011
at 08:10 PM

I'd upvote 10x if I could for the outstanding visual aids!

0dbd7154d909b97fe774d1655754f195

(16131)

on September 16, 2011
at 08:06 PM

You have a point FED. I jumped the gun on that one. Pants on animals is so not paleo.

Medium avatar

(19469)

on September 16, 2011
at 07:15 PM

Hahahah! You are SO right! I forgot about that :)

Medium avatar

(19469)

on September 16, 2011
at 07:15 PM

Animal farm is more "late neolithic" than Paleo, but not sure how the pigs wearing clothes thing fits in...

Medium avatar

(12379)

on September 16, 2011
at 04:12 PM

Morning Meredith - I've had better days - but I've had worse - that'll teach me to go for the whole bottle though!! Lord of the Flies was super paleo (kinda scary though!)

0dbd7154d909b97fe774d1655754f195

(16131)

on September 16, 2011
at 04:09 PM

Feelin' alright this morning Bree? Anyway the Ewoks are totally Paleo. I think the Lord of the Flies was pretty Paleo too. Maybe even Animal Farm.

Da8e709acde269e8b8bfbc09d1737841

(1906)

on September 16, 2011
at 03:17 PM

That's only the _female_ smurfs. Male smurfs are natural, and the meat's pretty lean.

6229cd9a7ca9882590259fae022e2647

(3209)

on September 16, 2011
at 02:08 PM

That's a very smurfy question.

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10 Answers

15
Ef9f83cb4e1826261a44c173f733789e

on September 16, 2011
at 02:04 PM

They're paleo if you don't roll them in breading and cook them in bad oils. Maybe Gargamel with chime in here with some decent recipes.

11
Medium avatar

(19469)

on September 16, 2011
at 07:41 PM

Ladies and gentlemen, let me present exhibit A...

are-smurfs-paleo?

You ask, "Are Smurfs Paleo?" and to that I say,

Are mushroom houses Paleo?

Is spending several hours a day, half naked, Paleo?

Is a Utopian society comprised of numerous male "drones" and a single mating pair Paleo?

Those little blue humanoids sound pretty Paleo so far, but let me direct you to exhibit B...

are-smurfs-paleo?

Here you can clearly see the defendant, known by his followers as "Papa Smurf" encouraging the consumption of a product called "Smurf Berry Crunch".

Now, lets take a look at my final piece of evidence...

are-smurfs-paleo?

Clearly stated in the ingredients label are: hydrogenated oils, grain flour, sugar, artificial flavors, artificial colors, and the chemical Butylated hydroxyanisole, or BHA, which has, at least in laboratory animals, been implicated tumors in the forestomach of rats, mice and hamsters, and livertumors in fish.

I would even go as far as saying that the blue pigmentation of the Smurf skin is a byproduct of toxic levels of "blue 1" also known as "brilliant blue FCF", which has been show to induce asthmatic episodes in predisposed individuals.

In conclusion, it is my strong opinion that not only are Smurfs "not Paleo", but by their promotion of products like "Smurfberry Crunch" they are a public nuisance and should be charged to the fullest extent of the law.

27e79ef3308bb5f2d7bd04ee7eea7b79

(2038)

on September 16, 2011
at 08:10 PM

I'd upvote 10x if I could for the outstanding visual aids!

77877f762c40637911396daa19b53094

(78467)

on September 16, 2011
at 08:42 PM

this is lovely funny:) thank you...

Af005ec9a8e028f2b04bf5367b64e0d6

(2797)

on September 16, 2011
at 09:10 PM

Actually, at least that cereal is rice, and the oils are Coconut and Palm. Much better than almost anything else I've seen on the shelf. That is definitely cereal I would cheat with. Can we still get that? Getting drunk and eating a box of smurf berry crunch is way more epic than getting drunk and separating a cheesecake from the graham cracker crust.

8
5437163ddf70d4532f196bfb4333753e

(3614)

on September 16, 2011
at 02:29 PM

Dude, smurfette was "magically created" by Papa Smurf. If that isn't Frankenfood, I don't know what is!!

Smurfs are DEFINITELY NOT paleo.

Da8e709acde269e8b8bfbc09d1737841

(1906)

on September 16, 2011
at 03:17 PM

That's only the _female_ smurfs. Male smurfs are natural, and the meat's pretty lean.

6
F6c1df7d5699661bd1f0d6d0a6c17fc6

on September 16, 2011
at 02:33 PM

I don't smurf if they are smurfy or not. I smurf them anyway as a smurf, but only once a month.

4
95eda9fa0cec952b482e869c34a566b6

on September 16, 2011
at 06:58 PM

They're great sauteed in beef tallow and garlic, after soaking them in red wine and herbs for a few hours.

4
Medium avatar

(12379)

on September 16, 2011
at 03:20 PM

I'm going to chime in that if we are going for kids cartoon/tv/movie references that are paleo my vote would be for the Ewoks - much better tribe!

EDIT More Ewok info here: http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Ewok These guys are SUPER PALEO!!

Medium avatar

(12379)

on September 16, 2011
at 04:12 PM

Morning Meredith - I've had better days - but I've had worse - that'll teach me to go for the whole bottle though!! Lord of the Flies was super paleo (kinda scary though!)

0dbd7154d909b97fe774d1655754f195

(16131)

on September 16, 2011
at 08:06 PM

You have a point FED. I jumped the gun on that one. Pants on animals is so not paleo.

0dbd7154d909b97fe774d1655754f195

(16131)

on September 16, 2011
at 04:09 PM

Feelin' alright this morning Bree? Anyway the Ewoks are totally Paleo. I think the Lord of the Flies was pretty Paleo too. Maybe even Animal Farm.

Medium avatar

(19469)

on September 16, 2011
at 07:15 PM

Animal farm is more "late neolithic" than Paleo, but not sure how the pigs wearing clothes thing fits in...

2
E4dd16dec3c8a37b1d3fa2ad60bc66ea

on September 16, 2011
at 02:55 PM

Gargamel created smurfette, Papa smurf only turned her from the 'evil' version. And that is so sad that I know that and feel the desire to bring that up.

Medium avatar

(19469)

on September 16, 2011
at 07:15 PM

Hahahah! You are SO right! I forgot about that :)

2
F910318b9aa27b91bcf7881f39b9eabe

on September 16, 2011
at 01:59 PM

One thing's for sure... they never appear to have the blues!

Probably a good n3:n6 ratio?

1
77877f762c40637911396daa19b53094

(78467)

on September 16, 2011
at 02:46 PM

What is there, like 100 men to 1 woman? Apparently, they have some sort of asexual reproductive mechanism? Like Frogs? Smurfette was probably male at some point. How is any of that paleo?

0
345c1755efe005edd162b770dc6fb821

(8767)

on September 16, 2011
at 06:54 PM

mainly because they are blue I'd say no, not paleo (there are color studies that say blue plates will cause you to eat less food...so I believe the theory goes with blue food as well!)

not grass fed either!

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