4

votes

Ever feel like purging?

Answered on September 12, 2014
Created December 26, 2011 at 4:08 PM

So never in my life, And I mean never, Have I thought seriously about sticking my finger down my throat: until today.

So I fell off the wagon a bit over the past few days with some chocolate and various homemade sweets (and a couple beers). Its my first time experiencing the effects of cheating, and it's unimaginably horrid. Not only am I broken out on my face, but my guts are in knots, I feel lethargic and unable to focus, and my skin is all clammy.

I know about all of the terrible side effects that come along with purging: addiction, teeth rotting, bad breath, etc, but I can't help but think that it would feel amazing right now.

Are there any benefits to gagging up what you've recently eaten? How much time does it take to start breaking down those nasty nasts in all those carbolicious sugary gobbs?

I doubt I'll go through with it (it's on my top 3 most-hated feelings, right next to drunken spins and forks scraping against my teeth), but thought i'd ask about your experiences with it.

Thanks!

66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

(12407)

on December 26, 2011
at 07:40 PM

Evelyn, is fasting really equivalent to purging? Right now I'm fasting for 24 hours because of the overeating I did yesterday. I don't feel hungry and in fact, I feel great. It seems like this is what the body is meant to do being that when it comes down to it, a healthy hypothalamus is trying to maintain energy balance and if you have taken on a couple thousand calories more than you typically would in a day, then your body is going to try to deal with that sooner rather than later. This has been my experience. I never have fasted or have been able to fast until i was metabolically healthy.

66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

(12407)

on December 26, 2011
at 07:35 PM

i vote to keep it open.

24df4e0d0e7ce98963d4641fae1a60e5

on December 26, 2011
at 07:03 PM

Please don't close this Melissa. Cats eat grass to throw up fur balls, not food! There's something about throwing up intentionally that sentient beings need to be very careful of. It is frightening how easy it is to go from doing it after the fact to mitigate damage to a premeditated binge/purge. I'm not accusing anyone of anything here, but I do wonder how much of that usual bloat from just eating too much gets twisted in minds to some bodily reaction to toxic onslaught. If a food really doesn't agree with you, it makes its way out fast one way or another.

1d0497f8781845ab371b479455bfee8e

(11157)

on December 26, 2011
at 06:28 PM

I've done the same on rare occasion, Dorado. Usually deliberate purging is followed within an hour or two after ingestion of whatever disagreed with me, not days afterward. A food has to make me feel really, really bad in order for me to induce vomiting. I've never once done it out of guilt.

96bf58d8c6bd492dc5b8ae46203fe247

(37227)

on December 26, 2011
at 06:27 PM

@Ambimorph, yes I came back and up-voted when I saw this was becoming a very honest, powerful exchange of information.

Medium avatar

(8239)

on December 26, 2011
at 06:11 PM

Glad to hear. Your mention of teeth and other issues suggested purging as an ongoing practice. To my mind, nothing wrong with the occasional purge when the body feels toxic.

1a98a40ba8ffdc5aa28d1324d01c6c9f

(20378)

on December 26, 2011
at 06:08 PM

+1 great response

100fd85230060e754fc13394eee6d6f1

(18696)

on December 26, 2011
at 05:56 PM

I'm upvoting this question because I think it is really important that people talk openly about it, and if anyone was considering it and changed their mind after reading the answers here, that will have been a good thing.

1f8384be58052b6b96f476e475abdc74

(2231)

on December 26, 2011
at 05:53 PM

please please do not do it, i second carbsane, hell email me and i will give you my phone # and we can talk. i have never thrown up food but purged in other ways. first, sit down, breathe and accept it. you wont get anywhere in the guilt until you do this. start right now accepting yourself and start making choices ALWAYS geared toward you, be selfish- happiness is about acceptance. that is prolly the most dangerous path of thinking you can ever go down, ever

1321554fbe74ad09e97c6e8c354021cc

(524)

on December 26, 2011
at 05:17 PM

With the risk of sounding defensive, I actually think it was closer to the situations you first mentioned. I truly feel/felt like I have/had something inside me poisoning me. It eill never become a persistant thought. Just more of an "I wish I kept a spare bottle of epicac in my back pocket" kind of moment.

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6 Answers

14
2c8c421cf0e0c462654c7dc37f8b9711

(2729)

on December 26, 2011
at 04:47 PM

As a bulimic struggling to get into recovery after 14 years of an eating disorder, I can say... Just don't. It's so easy and you think it's awesome... But then you just can't stop. If you just overeat, there's an end to it. You get too full, you have to stop. If you purge, you could set off a cycle that will literally ruin your life. Drink a glass of water, go for a walk, take a nap, forgive yourself. It's not worth it.

5
24df4e0d0e7ce98963d4641fae1a60e5

on December 26, 2011
at 05:19 PM

DON'T DO IT. PLEASE!!!

When I look back on my life, if there was one moment I would take back more than any other thing, it was using ipecac to induce vomiting after a huge binge that very first time. As Lizzish says ... "it's so easy" ... and scarily so. Before you know it you will intentionally binge knowing you will just rid yourself of most of the damage in short order. The same goes for any method of purging, including fasting, which, FWIW, was my usual method for around a year and a half while I could sustain it.

"Suck it up", learn from the experience and move forward. Did you binge because you "cheated" and had to have as much "bad food" as possible knowing you couldn't have it again the next day? In my experience this is the mindset that causes so many to develop ED's. If you find yourself going down this path, consider more moderate strategies such as planned cheats, plan-friendly substitutes, etc.

No diet/lifestyle is healthy for YOU if you let it take over your life to the point of contemplating this course. I'm hoping you return to tell us you didn't do it. But if you did, I hope you'll not beat yourself up over it to where you are tempted to punish yourself by doing it again. Do let those of us with experience with this help you stop it before it starts.

I can be reached at carbsane at gmail dot com.

66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

(12407)

on December 26, 2011
at 07:40 PM

Evelyn, is fasting really equivalent to purging? Right now I'm fasting for 24 hours because of the overeating I did yesterday. I don't feel hungry and in fact, I feel great. It seems like this is what the body is meant to do being that when it comes down to it, a healthy hypothalamus is trying to maintain energy balance and if you have taken on a couple thousand calories more than you typically would in a day, then your body is going to try to deal with that sooner rather than later. This has been my experience. I never have fasted or have been able to fast until i was metabolically healthy.

1f8384be58052b6b96f476e475abdc74

(2231)

on December 26, 2011
at 05:53 PM

please please do not do it, i second carbsane, hell email me and i will give you my phone # and we can talk. i have never thrown up food but purged in other ways. first, sit down, breathe and accept it. you wont get anywhere in the guilt until you do this. start right now accepting yourself and start making choices ALWAYS geared toward you, be selfish- happiness is about acceptance. that is prolly the most dangerous path of thinking you can ever go down, ever

1a98a40ba8ffdc5aa28d1324d01c6c9f

(20378)

on December 26, 2011
at 06:08 PM

+1 great response

5
Medium avatar

on December 26, 2011
at 04:51 PM

I have on rare occasion induced vomiting by the method you describe. Not because I overate but because I ate something that disagreed with me and felt queasiness getting stronger and wanted to have it out on my own terms, as it were, kneeling in bathroom. I experienced the positive results of purgation: getting something noxious out of my system.

What you are describing is something different, more extreme and frankly disordered. If this penance throug purgation ideation continues, you should consult the literature of eating problems and perhaps see a therapist with expertise in this area. Fortunately you're already aware of the health and sanitation issues that go with binging and purging.

ADDED EDIT:

As I read the various comments in this thread, I realize the extent to which "purge" and "purging" are phrases freighted with connotations from the eating-disorder universe. I knew that to be the case, but wasn't quite aware of the degree that answers like "No! Don't! Ever!" are informed, wisely, by lots of bad experience with pathological relationship to food.

My original comment was meant to convey this: At times when I have felt nauseous (due either to something disagreeable I ate, or perhaps to an impending bout with ill health, or possibly food poisoning), I have found it therapeutic to expedite the process with finger-down-throat. This is different from purging as a weight loss method, or purging as a way to get rid of guilt from "eating something I shouldn't have."

So just to be clear: I am not advocating purging as a solution to binge eating or any other "eating disorder." I am simply stating what seems to me the not particularly controversial fact that there are times when it is in the body's best interests to intentionally trigger the emptying of the stomach. The former seems to me intrinsically disordered; the latter seems to me a valid and therapeutically sound approach to restoring order.

We are all familiar, after all, with the various warnings: when to "induce vomiting" and when not to.

1d0497f8781845ab371b479455bfee8e

(11157)

on December 26, 2011
at 06:28 PM

I've done the same on rare occasion, Dorado. Usually deliberate purging is followed within an hour or two after ingestion of whatever disagreed with me, not days afterward. A food has to make me feel really, really bad in order for me to induce vomiting. I've never once done it out of guilt.

Medium avatar

(8239)

on December 26, 2011
at 06:11 PM

Glad to hear. Your mention of teeth and other issues suggested purging as an ongoing practice. To my mind, nothing wrong with the occasional purge when the body feels toxic.

1321554fbe74ad09e97c6e8c354021cc

(524)

on December 26, 2011
at 05:17 PM

With the risk of sounding defensive, I actually think it was closer to the situations you first mentioned. I truly feel/felt like I have/had something inside me poisoning me. It eill never become a persistant thought. Just more of an "I wish I kept a spare bottle of epicac in my back pocket" kind of moment.

5
96bf58d8c6bd492dc5b8ae46203fe247

(37227)

on December 26, 2011
at 04:22 PM

When my binge eating disorder became apparent, I gave serious thought to adding the purge half and using bulemia to control my weight. Sounds like a teenager, doesn't it?

Up-chucking, as the jockeys used to call it, just isn't worth the damage it will do to your mouth and throat and you psyche. Yesterday and/or the past week are gone and forgotten.

Today is a bright, shiny morning and as The Quilt said on another thread, "No one can go back and start a new beginning at life, but any one of us can start today and make a new ending to our life."

Start today and just go back to sensible ancestral eating. If it turns out you gained a pound or few, ease it off over the next 2 weeks and go on with your life.

1
1a98a40ba8ffdc5aa28d1324d01c6c9f

(20378)

on December 26, 2011
at 06:09 PM

No need to do it. Just start eating better today. You will be fine.

0
9d43f6873107e17ca4d1a5055aa7a2ad

on December 26, 2011
at 06:48 PM

I've gotten requests to close this. I'm on the fence. Let me know what you think. I would note that many animals do this, like cats who eat grass and then throw up. But among primates it's more common to use purgative substances (see Wild Health) like mineral clays and fibrous fruits. Personally, I occasionally use activated charcoal if my stomach feels pwn'd. But today I didn't need it since I ate some Gluten Ease with my cheat yesterday. Another thing to try is buying some frozen cranberries and blending them with water, then drinking the mixture. One of my friends swears by the GT's Chia seed kombucha, but I worry that might just damage the gut lining. Purging doesn't have to involve throwing up, but be careful!

66e6b190e62fb3bcf42d4c60801c7bf6

(12407)

on December 26, 2011
at 07:35 PM

i vote to keep it open.

24df4e0d0e7ce98963d4641fae1a60e5

on December 26, 2011
at 07:03 PM

Please don't close this Melissa. Cats eat grass to throw up fur balls, not food! There's something about throwing up intentionally that sentient beings need to be very careful of. It is frightening how easy it is to go from doing it after the fact to mitigate damage to a premeditated binge/purge. I'm not accusing anyone of anything here, but I do wonder how much of that usual bloat from just eating too much gets twisted in minds to some bodily reaction to toxic onslaught. If a food really doesn't agree with you, it makes its way out fast one way or another.

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